I have found myself in a situation that has me terrified and confused. Terrified because things could have gone many different ways. I could have ended up being sick. I could have lost my life too. Fortunately though, the higher powers chose to spare me. It’s just that I don’t feel like a lucky girl right now. All because I fell in love with a man.

I agreed to give him a chance three and a half years ago. Mentioning the figure makes it sound like it wasn’t long ago. However, I feel like I have been with this man all my life. As far as I was concerned, he was my future. Everything I did, I had him in mind.

Even when I had to make a decision concerning my own life, I would ask myself first, “How will this affect Mensah?” I would factor his comfort, his convenience, and even his approval into my decisions. This is because of how committed I am to him.

I gave him that kind of consideration because I felt he also did the same things when it came to me. This is one of the reasons I didn’t listen to people when they tried to warn me about him. I felt I knew my man better than anyone. And the man I knew wouldn’t intentionally do anything to hurt me.

According to the stories I heard, he was dating another lady alongside me. I was surprised when I first heard this. I’m sure if I already had suspicions about him, those stories would only serve as confirmation. However, there were no signs to show he had another woman.

I took the gossip with a pinch of salt but another person stepped out and told me the same thing. This person even pointed out the lady to me but I didn’t do anything about it. A few other people also came out and said something about this same lady. I ignored all of them.

Recently, the lady and I had an encounter. It was something dramatic enough to draw other people’s attention to us. I would spare you the details but indeed, it was quite a scene. All the information I ignored came to light that day. I could no longer be in denial. I received confirmation that my Mensah was involved with her.

As I am writing this story, the lady is no longer here with us. She fell ill and passed away. Because of what happened between us, everyone is blaming me for her death. Some people are saying I cursed her. Others have also said, “You took her to a spiritualist to eliminate her.” These kinds of words sting my heart. Lord knows I didn’t do her any harm.

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Now here is the thing. In the wake of all the confusion following her demise, Mensah’s friend who is a doctor reached out to me. He attended to her during her last moments. He told me; “Ignore what everyone is saying. She was HIV-positive before she died. With a compromised immune system, anything can happen.” I almost passed out when I heard this.

Quickly, I went to the nearest clinic and got tested. This is where I said I could have gotten sick or also lost my life like her. Luckily, I tested negative.

I should have been relieved but I am not. Mensah’s friend also told me; “That lady wasn’t the only person your man was involved with. He has other girls too. So I am sure he is a walking incubator of STDs. I’m looking for a way to get him tested. I will let you know what I find but until then, wear a condom when you get intimate with him.”

He asked me not to disclose anything he shared with me with Mensah. My problem is, we don’t use protection already. So how do I enforce it now? What explanation would I give him when I ask him to use protection? I am so confused.

—Audrey

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