She was on the roadside waiting for a taxi. I was watching her. She couldn’t stand on her feet so every now and then, she’ll walk to sit on a rock under a tree, a little far from the road. She’ll hear the sound of an approaching car, she’ll get up and try to get to the road and stop it but by the time she gets there, the car might have passed. I watched her for several minutes, she missed a lot of taxis. I went to her and asked what was wrong with her, “I’m sick. I’m trying to get a taxi to the hospital but I can’t stand for long to get one.” She was almost in tears as she spoke. I stood in the sun, waited until a taxi came around and I stopped it for her. 

She was sick and in pain but that couldn’t suppress her beauty and innocent face. She sounded like a missing child when she spoke. I thought about her all day. We had a shop by that road, my mother’s shop. I hated sitting in the shop but because of this girl, that day, I was in the shop all day waiting for her to return. I was thinking, “Why didn’t I get her number? I don’t even know her name, why didn’t I ask her?” I answered myself, “She was too sick to have responded to my questions. I’ll definitely see her again and get her name and her number.

Because of her, I was in the shop all week, waiting for an opportunity to see her again. One early morning, the universe gave me another chance to right the wrong of my first encounter with her. She was standing by the roadside again, exactly the point I saw her the first time. I ran to her and said, “Hey….” She recognized me instantly. She asked me, “Do you live around here?” I pointed to my mom’s shop and told her, “That’s my mom’s shop. I come here often to help.” 

She thanked me for the help the other time and even asked my name. I answered, “I’m Peter.” She said, “Peter, I’m Anas. Thanks for the other time. It’s bad that I only see you when I’m going to the hospital.” We laughed about it. We had little talks until a taxi arrived. When she was stepping in, I asked for her number and she mentioned them to me. I called her until she grew comfortable to start calling me too. We found ourselves talking on the phone all night one night. “If she likes me enough to stay this long on the phone with me, then she’ll say yes if I propose.” I did propose that night and she said yes to me.  The beginning of the journey of our love. 

Anas was always sick. I dated her for two years and there was not a single month that passed by that Anas didn’t get sick. She’s a trained teacher and was teaching in one of the prestigious schools in town but she was mostly home because she was often sick. I didn’t have a permanent job when I found her. A few months after meeting her, I got a good job. I told her she was my lucky charm and I told her I was going to do everything in my power to help her get the healing she deserved. So even when she wasn’t sick, I held her by the hand and took her to facilities that had specialists to help her. When we heard that one herbal facility could help her, I sent her there. She was stable for a long while until one night she collapsed in my hand. My heart stopped beating for a while. I thought she was going to die. I rushed her to the hospital and she ended up spending almost a week there. 

Her mom came around to help her but I was there every day to ensure she was doing good and also pay for her drugs. The day she was discharged, I saw a complimentary card in her drug bag. The person was a doctor. She saw me looking at it and she told me, “It’s from one of the doctors there. He said I may react to one of the drugs so I should call him when it happens.” It didn’t sound well in my ears but it sounded like a good thing. So when she started vomiting and complaining of weakness in her joints, I called the doctor and explained everything to him and he said I should send her to the hospital the following day if the pain and vomit persists. The following day I did, it was a weekend so I spent the whole day there with her.

After that, she became very stable. For a whole month she didn’t fall sick. She was coming back to her glowing state, she was laughing a lot and was always joyful. One evening, she was sleeping when the screen of her phone lit up. I checked and the name on the phone was “Doc.” The only person that came to mind was that doctor. It was almost 11pm. “Why is this guy calling my girlfriend at this time? Have they been talking after that incident? Are they friends?” These questions led me to find out more answers from her phone. On her call log, it was evident that they had been talking at least twice a day. There have been mobile money transactions between them where Anas was the receiver. I was scared to go through their chat. I knew what I would read might break my heart but I went ahead and checked what was going on. 

The doctor had proposed and she has said yes to him. That was like a week ago. Before the proposal, the doctor asked about me and her answer was, “He’s my brother. He was here with me because of my condition. He lives not too far from me with his girlfriend so when I’m down he comes around to help.” 

My heart was on fire while I read this. They had gone out often and judging by a photo the doctor sent to her, Anas had been in her house. She was sitting in a hall drinking something when the photo was taken. The caption was, “I couldn’t stop looking at you.” 

I woke her up right there and asked her about the chats. She was fumbling. Her first answer was, “It’s nothing serious. Don’t think deeply about it.” I screamed, “You told him I’m your brother and you say it’s nothing serious? You’ve been in his house and you still tell me it’s nothing serious? How many times have you gone out with him? I know you’ve slept with him and you still have the gut to tell me it’s nothing serious? Maybe I don’t know what’s serious so you tell me about it.” 

She had no explanations so she was quiet. When I pushed her she said, “He was giving me pressure so I figured I should just say yes and get him off my neck. It’s nothing serious. I need his help to get better and not fall sick again. He had been arranging with his friends to meet me and check me up free of charge. It’s just the help that I need that’s why I’m keeping him around.” I said, “Shame on you. You’re not even sorry. Look at the trash you’re telling me. It’s OK. From today, you’re not going to pick up his calls again. You won’t chat with him. In fact, you’re going to block him. No contact whatsoever.” 

She nodded. I gave her the phone and asked her to do it right in front of me. She did. She cried and apologized. I felt we could give ourselves another chance to win again. “It’s just a week-old affair. I’ll fight it. I’ll win. If you love a woman, you fight for her. You don’t let a good woman go because of one mistake. I’ve got this. I’m the man.” 

I pepped myself up and was ready for the battle. I increased the time spent with her. I’d met her mom but not her dad. I asked her to introduce me officially so she took me home to introduce me officially to her parents. Her mom already knew me so she was happy that I could come home officially. My parents already knew her so there was no need for an official introduction but one day in her presence, I told my dad, “We are getting ready to get married so get ready. We’ll go and see her family soon.” She giggled. My dad said, “I’m always ready.”

I was only living a fool’s dream. One evening I went to her house without telling her I was coming. It was around 10pm and she had texted me goodnight. It felt so sudden so I decided to go and check if she was home. She wasn’t. I called her phone a million times and she didn’t pick up. I wanted to wait and see the time she’ll come home. I was there until around 5am when a car came to drop her off. I didn’t see it was her until the car had moved and she was walking towards the gate. I nearly hit a woman that early dawn but the voice of my conscience was louder. God’s restraining powers were heavy on me so even when I lifted my arm, I slowly put it down. She said, “Are you going to beat me? Am I your daughter? Go ahead. I’m watching you. Hit me. Go on, hit me.” 

“Who was that? The doctor right? So you lied to me? You were with him all night so you didn’t pick up my calls right? Is that how low you can sink? Talk, it’s the doctor right?” 

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She walked me by and went straight to her door. I held her arm and asked her to stand there. She asked, “Are you going to beat me? Go ahead and beat me. I won’t answer that question.” She hung on to me beating her for the rest of my time there. She didn’t answer any of my questions. I knew it was over. I couldn’t compete in a game the rules are skewed against me. I told myself, “It’s not worth it. Let her go. If you continue to stay, you’ll only hurt yourself.” 

Even after that, I made a series of attempts to get her attention again. The sad thing is that I was the one who called and apologized to her for attempting to hit her. She showed no repentance whatsoever. She acted like she deserved the apology the whole time. While I walked around with my bleeding heart, she walked around feeling right to love whoever she wants to love. She made it plain to me at some point that she can’t leave the doctor because he was looking to end her sickness. It was hard but I slowly bowed out of the relationship. The day I stopped calling, her call never came on my phone again.

A little over a year later, she got married to the doctor. 

I look at the whole story and I tell myself, “Maybe it’s a role I was required to play in her life.” I took her to that hospital where she met the doctor. I even made the first call to the doctor. I don’t know whether she was ever going to call him. I made their meeting possible but I was the one who ended up hurting. If a bigger hand had a role to play in this whole thing then that bigger hand doesn’t like me that much. How can I be made to carry the one I love to another man to marry? But in all things, we are required to give praise so I give praise and move on with my life. 

—Peter

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