While I was serving as maid of honour for a friend in January this year, the wedding photographer asked me, “Please, can I get a handkerchief?” I didn’t have a handkerchief on me at that moment but I told him I would get it for him. When I got the chance, I went in search of it but I didn’t get any. What I got were some tissues. I brought them to him and he said, “No, tissues won’t do. Get me a handkerchief.” I was busy so I discarded the tissues and went about my duties. This was at the engagement ceremony.

When it was time for the wedding ceremony, we needed to take some pictures before the bride walked up the aisle. I went to call this photographer and the first thing he said when he saw me was, “Eii, so you refused to get me the handkerchief.” I smiled and explained that I had a lot on my plate. He took it well and we even made jokes about it.

After the ceremony, I wanted some of the pictures he took of me. I figured if he took good ones, I could post them for my birthday. So I took his number from my friend and texted him. He sent me the photos he took of me and they were really nice. The only problem was that I wasn’t the only one in the shots.

I was a little disappointed but I didn’t make a big deal out of it. I ended up having a conversation with him instead. When I met him at the wedding, I didn’t know he was someone I would enjoy talking to. We clicked like a key in a lock. Unlike the uptight photographer who insisted I find him a handkerchief in the middle of a marriage ceremony, the relaxed version of him was fun.

Conversations became a daily routine for us. I enjoyed his company so much that I started getting attached to him. As time went on, I realized that it wasn’t just an attachment. I had fallen in love with him. I am usually the kind of girl who waits for a man to make his move. No matter how much I liked a boy, I would swallow my feelings until he stepped forward to show interest in me. However, what I felt for this photographer was different.

For the first time in my life, I was the first to tell a man, “I am in love with you.” When I said this, my heart was on my sleeves. I was scared that he would reject me and I would end up making a fool out of myself. But to my surprise, he responded; “That’s a relief. Because I am also in love with you. I was worried if I came forward and you didn’t feel the same way, it would make things awkward. Now that I know how you feel, will you be my girlfriend?” I excitedly said yes, and we started a relationship. This happened in March this year.

I have noticed that ever since we started dating, I am the one who initiates conversations. Sometimes if I don’t call or text him, we would just be there without talking to each other. I comforted myself that at least he calls sometimes so it’s not all that bad.

This is a big compromise for me. This is because I feel mostly loved when my man is the one who does the calling and the texting. It reminds me that I am in his thoughts. So dating a man who waits for me to call and text him first has been hard.

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I have a personal problem I have been working on. It has to do with mood swings. There are days I don’t feel any iota of happiness. I try to control it but sometimes it takes over me. When it happens, I don’t feel like talking to anyone. I know people will feel bad if I go about ignoring them so I try my best to function.

My boyfriend also has a problem. Unlike me, he has refused to acknowledge his own. So he is not working on it. Whenever we had a misunderstanding, he would go for days without talking to me. I would have to call him to have a conversation before he would let it go.

Why Men Don’t Say “I Love You” To Each Other

There were days I told myself, “If this guy doesn’t call me, I won’t also call him. Let me see how long he can go without talking to me.” I would wait for days but he’d never call. I am the one who ends up breaking my resolve. I have spoken to him about it several times. I’d always tell him, “If there’s a problem, we should sit and resolve it. That will be better than giving each other the cold shoulder.” He would listen to me but do the exact opposite.

Just the other day, he started giving me attitude again. I don’t know what I did. I called him for three days continuously. The only thing he said was, “How are you?” After I said, “I am fine,” he wouldn’t talk again. So I stopped calling to see if he would call. It has been four days now and he hasn’t called or texted. Please, should I forget about him or still give him a chance? I love him and always wait to see his name on my phone’s screen because he is the only person I talk to.

Sherry 

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