I was at home when she showed up. She didn’t call to tell me she was coming, not even a text. She just showed up at my doorstep like a package a dispatch rider just dropped off. Because I wasn’t expecting any visitors, her presence unsettled me. And the fact that this particular visitor is my ex-girlfriend did not help matters. I didn’t know what she wanted or why she was at my place. Sure, our relationship ended on our mutual agreement that we weren’t compatible, but we were not friends after the breakup. So I was surprised when she went to my kitchen to look for food and when she didn’t find any, she offered to cook. After which she served me and sat beside me to eat. She was acting every bit like we were still together. Her behaviour was confusing so I asked her; “We haven’t been on the friendliest of terms since we broke up. So I find it strange that you are sitting in my living room acting like you are my girlfriend. What’s going on?” “Oh, it’s nothing,” she shrugged, “I just miss you and wanted to come hang out.”

Priscilla doesn’t do anything just for the sake of doing it. She is a calculating scheming woman. Everything she does is part of a master plan to achieve a specific goal. So I knew that she did not visit me just because she missed me. I knew her too well to believe it was something as simple as that. I just didn’t know exactly what she was aiming at in the end. That’s why I asked her, “How is your boyfriend doing?” She locked those soulful eyes on me and answered, “He is fine, but why are you asking about him?” “Because I am wondering if he knows you are here, spending time with your ex-boyfriend.” She gave me a look that said, “Shut up, it’s none of your business.” So I didn’t push any further.

She didn’t leave my place until it was nightfall. After she left I became very concerned. Our relationship didn’t end badly enough for me to cut her off. But that doesn’t mean I want to be a pawn in whatever game she was playing. The good thing is, I am friends with her boyfriend’s sister. So immediately after she left, I called the lady. And I casually mentioned Priscilla in our conversation. We talked about her for a while and then  I asked, “I know this is none of my business but is your brother treating her well? I am no longer with her but I still care about her.” The lady lit up, “Oh yes, my brother is very happy with her. Both our families have been having meetings about their marriage preparations. The knocking ceremony is even coming off this coming Saturday. So don’t worry your head or try to plant yourself in the middle of their relationship.”

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After the conversation, I became more confused. I asked myself why someone who is getting married to another man would spend the whole day with her ex. I also didn’t want to worry about it so I told myself, “Maybe Priscilla only visited me because she missed me, and nothing more.” Then the next morning, I woke up to her sending me a “good morning” text. I wanted to reply to her with, “Congratulations on your knocking ceremony tomorrow,” but I thought better of it and hoped she would tell me herself. But she didn’t say anything to me. All she did was text me the entire day, asking how I am doing, what I am doing, and where I am at. I didn’t want her back at my place so I stepped out of the house and told her I had to go to work even though it was my day off.

The knocking ceremony took place as planned, and still, Priscilla didn’t tell me anything. I also didn’t ask her. She grew relentless in wanting to spend time with me but I also did my best to avoid her. I knew for sure that nothing good would come out of our spending time together. As I said, there is no bad blood between us so the likelihood of our nearness to each other escalating to shuperu was very high. I didn’t know if that was her plan but I was not about to find out. Another man’s fiancée is a no-go area for me. While I was avoiding her, I was getting updates from her boyfriend’s sister. She told me the wedding date the first time it was fixed, which was last year. And she also called to tell me when the date was postponed. Meanwhile, Priscilla still didn’t say anything about it.

Just last week, she fell ill and was admitted to a hospital close to my house. After her first night at the hospital, she called me to tell me where she was. I had done everything to avoid her company until that phone call. I rushed to the hospital to go and see her. She was alone when I got there so I stayed with her and got her food. When the nurses came with their needles and she needed comfort, I offered her my hand. At some point, I tried to leave but she begged me to stay, so I did. Her mother only came for a brief visit and left without saying a word to me. I was there till it was late into the night. Even so, the nurses had to assure her that she would be fine without me before she let me go.

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She was discharged the next day. I wasn’t at the hospital that day so she called me after she got home. In the course of our chat, she blurted out, “I am getting married in three weeks’ time.” I already knew about it but I acted surprised and congratulated her. “No, don’t congratulate me,” she said, “I don’t know if I am taking the right step here. Instead of clarity, I wake up every day feeling confused. My fiancé is a good guy and he loves me, but I keep wondering if he is the right fit for me.” The chips fell into place after that confession. Her desperate attempt to always talk to me and spend time with me was probably her attempt at getting closure. Now she has asked me to tell her what to do. “Should I go ahead and marry him despite my uncertainties? Or should I call the wedding off? Whatever you tell me to do, I will do it.” That’s what she said. I don’t want her to make a decision she will regret based on my advice. Please what should I tell her?

–Frimpong

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