Respectful. Check.
Submissive. Check.
Kind-hearted. Check.
Good cook. Check.
Doesn’t keep her money to herself. Check.
Supports my dreams. Check.
Adventurous in bed. Umm… this is where there is a problem.

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I was worried about her lack of enthusiasm in the bedroom until she told me at some point in the relationship that her libido was low. This admission on her part answered a lot of questions for me. For instance, the fact that she never initiates intimacy, or how she always lies motionless while I do all the work. It is always as if she has no interest in her own pleasure.

Because of this, I bought her medication to help boost her libido. She took it as prescribed, but it didn’t change anything between us.

We live together, but we can go for three whole months without doing it. If I don’t initiate it, she won’t. It doesn’t even bother her when it doesn’t happen. She would sleep from 9 AM to 6 PM straight.

Sometimes I would rouse her in the middle of the night for some action. She would just tell me, “Do whatever you want to do, I am tired.” Then she would go back to sleep. I have gotten used to sleeping with a woman who is asleep because of her.

I used to think she behaved this way because she was involved with another man. I have checked her phone and monitored her closely. There is no other man. In fact, she is faithful to a fault. I’m the only man in her life.

I can even say that she puts me at the center of her life. I am saying this because of how well she supports me in everything I do. She takes care of the home fully, yet she still contributes her money to paying the bills.

If it weren’t for this issue with intimacy, I would have said I landed myself the perfect woman. What I don’t understand is how a woman in her late twenties doesn’t care about having an exciting sex life. I have heard that women are usually very active in the bedroom when they get to this age. So why is mine perfectly fine with our boring affairs?

I never intended to, but I am cheating on her as I share my story. She doesn’t know I am doing it—not even a suspicion. As far as she is concerned, if I am not at work, I am always at home.

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She has instructed me to always be at home before 9 PM no matter the circumstances. I make sure I am home way earlier than 9. That’s why she believes I am as faithful to her as Abraham was to God.

I don’t enjoy sneaking around and deceiving her. It’s just that I respect her too much to leave clues for her to grow any suspicions. So, though I make time to see the other lady, I don’t do it at night. Also, no phone calls with her when I’m at home. We stick to texting. Even that one—I don’t do it with a commitment that would make me suspicious.


All my efforts to cover my tracks are taking a toll on me. Cheating is not as easy as it seems. And honestly, I’m not cut out for it. I see it as a fruitless venture. I want to stop and just stick to one woman.

I love my girlfriend. She is a good woman, but I am not getting everything I want from her. I don’t know what else I can do to help fix her libido. Medication didn’t work. What else would work? If I don’t get a solution soon, I will have no choice but to leave her.

—Prince

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