The company I was working for transferred me to another place of work but before I left, they brought a new girl to take up the role I was leaving behind. One morning, my boss called me into her office and that was the first time I met the new girl. My boss said, “This is the new girl coming to replace you. She’s Barbara. But before you finally leave the following month, please train her. She should know everything you know before you leave.” So that morning, I left my boss’ office with Barbara following me. When we got to my office, I offered her a seat. “It’s a small office,” I told her, “until I leave next month, the two of us are going to share this space.”
Her training began immediately and I was impressed with the way she caught things very easily. It was just the two of us each morning till we closed. We went out for lunch together and came back together. We spent our break time together, talking about just anything that came to mind. When they called a staff meeting, we both walked to the venue together and we sat next to each other. A kind of friendship blossomed between us when we were not looking. She called after work and I called her sometimes
One day, the conversation took a different turn and became personal. I got to know about her family and she got to know about mine. We discussed the future, our fears and what we intend to do when faced with certain fears. There was nothing we didn’t talk about. It had been two weeks since we shared the small office together. One day at our discussion table, we nearly kissed. Just when our lips were about to meet, I pulled off. It didn’t happen once or twice but each time, I was the one who pulled away. That night she sent me a text, “Why did you pull away?” I responded, “It’s complicated.” She said, “Tell me about it.” I said, “There’s a woman in my life. We’ve been together for two years now and things a heading in the right direction. I don’t want to start something I can’t finish. The complication here is my feelings toward you. I like you but….”
She said, “I can understand. Don’t worry.”
The next day at the office, we brought the topic again. She said, “Your honesty is very sexy. I should turn away and go after you told me you are saying someone else but I’ve realized what you said had rather increased my love for you. I respect you more for your honesty and it makes me feel safe around.” She pushed me to the limit. She wanted us to start a relationship on the side but I knew how things can turn sour just within a twinkle of an eye so I stood my ground and made her understand that we could only be friends. Luckily for us, the days ran faster until the time came for me to leave.
When I left, we tried keeping together the friendship we built but the harder we tried to stay connected, the more the distance between us got widened. We texted each other once in a while and called to ask each other “How are you” once in a while. Nothing we did could make us stick together as we used. Six months later, I was going through the most difficult time in my love life. The girl I was dating called it quit because she couldn’t keep up with a distance relationship. The sad thing is, she called it quit when she had already found someone else. I was broken and needed someone to talk to. Guess who I called…Barbara.
She did well with me. She said all the right things and gave me a listening ear. We got closer again, calling each other every day and night just like we used to do. One day I said, “Nothing can hold me back now. Can we take it from where we left the last time?” She took in a deep breath and said, “I’m seeing someone else. We started only three months ago. He’s a kind man and I can’t do that to him.” It felt like a dagger through my heart but I kept my cool and wished her well. She said, “I hope this will not break us apart like it happened the other time.” I said, “Noooo, not at all. I have time for you.”
READ ALSO: The Craziest Thing a Boyfriend Has Ever Asked Me to Do
We started breaking apart again. Calls became harder to make and text messages went unanswered on several occasions. I didn’t want to stick around knowing I couldn’t have her. I moved away, looking for my own sunshine. Several months later she called; “Marcus, can we talk?” I said, “Yeah why not?” She said, “It didn’t work out.” I asked, “What do you mean?” She said, “The guy I was dating. I wasn’t the main chick. I was the side chick.” It was my turn to help nurse a broken heart. We talked about it every day and joke about the issue until she finally could laugh about it. She moved on with her life. When she asked if she still had a chance in my life I said, “I’m seeing someone now but hey we are still the best of friends.”
We couldn’t be together because I was dating someone else.
I loved her but she was never available when I was available. Maybe the two of us were not meant to be. We didn’t seek to push ourselves to be together when the situations of our lives weren’t right. We accepted our fate and moved on with our lives.
It’s been six years since we both met for the first time in our boss’ office. She no longer works at the company again and I no longer work for the company too. When we met, I was single. I would have loved to date her but I didn’t ask. I thought she was dating. Several months later, she sent me a wedding invitation with a text, “Finally, a tattered heart finds a home.” I laughed and said, “You deserve it girl. Congratulations.”
Sometimes, I wish I did all I could to win her, even if I had to snatch her from her boyfriend but I’m also reminded that not all things lead to a happy ending. The most important thing now is she’s happy and I’m single and free.
