My father died lonely and alone. It became a lesson for me to marry well so I don’t end up going the way my father did. My mom wasn’t a bad wife but she died early. We were expecting my dad to marry again but he told us, “Marriage is not something any man should experience twice in a single lifetime. Once is great. Once is all you need.”

He loved my mom so much he didn’t want to replace her so he died lonely and unhappy.

When I married my wife, my prayer was for us to live longer together but the longer we live, the more I become scared. When it comes to money, my wife is the worst person you’ll ever live with. She won’t even spend on herself let alone spend on you.

We have three kids. I pay for everything concerning their existence. In the house we live, I pay for everything. Apart from that, she’ll take money from me for her personal stuff. It doesn’t bother me that I do all that. Her salary is smaller than mine by GHC1,000 but this woman doesn’t use her money on anything concerning the family.

She had malaria and went to the drugstore. I wasn’t there but she came to tell me. The guy at the counter introduced two drugs to her; “This one will cure you in no time. No pain, no stress. This one works but not that efficiently.”

My wife bought the less efficient one because it was cheaper. Not because she couldn’t afford the expensive one. She could but she didn’t. Her sickness got worse and was admitted to the hospital. I had to foot all the bills. She does it to my kids and does it to herself.

She took money from me to buy a wig for my brother’s wedding. She ended up buying a cheaper one because she “Didn’t want to waste money on a wig.”

I love her. I wish she could change but no amount of conversation amounts to anything. When I ask what she does with her money she tells me it’s a wrong question to ask. My dad died lonely because he didn’t have a wife attending to him. I might not die lonely. A wife will be by my side but I’ll die because she won’t part with her money for my sake.

What Nobody Tells You About Divorce | Chat & Chuckles Podcast

So I work hard. I’m the last to sleep but the first to wake up. I don’t pray for bad things to happen but when they do, I should have enough money in my account to take care of myself. This kind of life is scary. To have a wife, a support system but can’t rely on her for support in times of need. Is that how marriage is supposed to be?

— Damien 

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