There’s a program in the house and most of the family members are back home to attend the program. It looks like a family reunion looking at the faces we are seeing around. My senior sister also came with her husband, Edem and we are living in the same house. My sister and Edem have been married for almost ten years.
They have the kind of marriage you observe from afar and say, “What a perfect couple.” Edem, to me, is a gentleman judging from the way he treats my sister. Now, to the reason I’m sharing this story.
Since they came around, my sister has had issues with everything I wear in the house. It started with my nightie. I live with my mom and dad and the TV is in the hall. I’ll bathe, dress up in my nightie and go to the hall and watch TV. It’s been like this for ages and no one complains.
My sister saw me in my nightie and was very angry. “How can you dress like this and sit around here? Don’t you have anything to wear apart from this see-through?”
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Everyone including her husband was there. My mom gave me an eye and I left the hall. The next morning I confronted her and told her to know how to talk to me. She said, “Then you should know how to carry yourself around when other people’s husbands are around.”
From that day, she started policing my dress. When I wear a skirt, “It’s too short. Don’t you have any decent thing to wear?” When I wear a trouser, “It’s too tight. Who do you want to show your ass to?” As for my tops, she’ll go like, “We all know your boobs are standing. Wear something that covers them.”
Honestly, I got so angry and it became confrontational. My mom was there and my dad too. They were supporting me because they couldn’t understand the aim of the policing. Out of anger, I told her, “What I wear is not the problem. If you think it will worry your husband, then he’s the problem. Tackle it from there and leave my dressing alone.”
She insulted me from hair to toe and even followed me to my room to continue there. Once I said what was in my heart, I didn’t utter another word. I think she told my parents she’ll never recognize me as a sister again so they are worried. Honestly, I don’t care but my parents care and they want me to apologize because I’m the youngest.
I have to apologize not because I said something wrong ooo. They think I’m young and the younger one can’t be right so I should apologize. I told them, “Lie lie. I’ll never give that apology today nor tomorrow.”
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They are pressing me. All of a sudden they are on my sister’s side.
Did I do anything wrong here? I didn’t insult her. She was the one who insulted my choices and even said no man will carry someone like me to his house. Who deserves an apology here?
—Mercy
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My dear, I’m not sure you are angry because of what your sister said but probably how she said it. If you want peace to reign, kindly wear decent clothes for the sake of the “visitor” around; your sister’s husband. Imagine if it were any other visitor, say your pastor or an elderly person, would you have worn the clothes your sister is complaining about?? I got married quite recently so I understand where your sister is coming from. It’s not an issue about her husband but it’s just courteous and it communicates respect between you and your sister’s husband. You may not understand now but someday when you get married, you’ll understand your sister better.
So for these few days they are spending with you, kindly wear some decent clothes around the house. Thank you
There is a difference between leaving alone with your family and also leaving when there is a guest or guests. You don’t just wear anything because that is your home. Learn to read books on mannerisms or courtesy for boys and girls. You will learn a whole lot of things and earn some respect for yourself
You guys are being judgemental, her sister have been married for the past ten years so her husband ought to be family by now, and beside her sister manner of communication is poor, she ought to have cal her younger sis tel her that her dress is revealin for the sake of her husband she should wear something modest, not scolding her like she is her child. she dont owe her any apology
Hmmm. Your sister did not communicate well at all. But she made some good points which were lost because of anger on both sides. Perhaps there are struggles in the marriage you know nothing about- why not be your Sister s keeper by just being modest. Perhaps you don’t care about your Sister enough to be modest for the sake of her but just remember that we all reap what we sow. One day somebody s son will love you and carry you off to ” his” house- how would you want that young beautiful neice to dress around your man- just for a few days whilst he s around?