Ever since I got married, I have always been apologizing to my husband. Even when he is the one who is wrong, I end up apologizing to him. If I don’t do it, he makes my life miserable. He would report me to his mother and the two of them would gang up on me. They would insult me and call me all sorts of names until I’d end up telling the two of them, “I am sorry,” for something he did.

There was a time when this man cheated on me. You would think that he would at least express remorse when I caught him. No, he didn’t. He rather got angry that I confronted him.

Normally, when a man cheats and he is caught, he doesn’t even want his parents to know. At least that’s how the stories I hear and read go. Not my husband though. He told his mother what he did. Then he reported me to his mother that I confronted him.

You would think this woman would understand the pain and betrayal that comes with a husband cheating. Even if she wouldn’t empathize with me, she could have chosen to stay away from the situation. She did neither of these. She chose to join her son to insult me.

“My son is the man of this house,” she said, “You don’t have any right to question him.”

My husband then told me, “Do you know the number of women out there who want me? Or do you think because I married you, you are special? Those women are even far better than you.”

Back then, I was the quiet type so all I did was cry. I couldn’t even voice out how deeply his words cut. Not to him, not to anyone. I brooded over these words for so long before I finally let go and moved on.

My feelings never mattered to this man and when I got pregnant with our second child it even got worse. He stopped sharing a bed with me completely. Even now that our child is almost two and a half years old, he still doesn’t come to my bed. I don’t know where he goes to get his intimate needs met and I dare not ask. If not, we will fight again.

About five months ago, he brought his younger brother to live with us in our chamber and hall apartment.

I have been doing my best to get along peacefully with this guy but something about him bothers me. He doesn’t sleep in our bedroom but he has a habit of barging in unannounced. I have asked him politely several times to knock before he enters the room but he ignores my requests.

That’s how he ended up barging in on me naked one time. He didn’t even apologize for doing that. Neither did he change his ways. So I started locking my bedroom door whenever I was inside.

My husband travelled last week. I didn’t want any drama so I locked the bedroom door before I slept. I was far gone when my brother-in-law came knocking so I didn’t hear him. Instead of going to sleep in his usual place in the hall and knock on my bedroom door again in the morning, he called my husband and their mother.

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I don’t know what he told them, but they got angry that I locked the door. These people called me and insulted me as if I had committed a crime.

When my husband returned from his trip three days ago, he made this whole issue with his brother a big fight. I honestly don’t understand what the anger is all about. Am I wrong for asking my brother-in-law to knock before entering our bedroom?

That Is The Craziest Thing I’ve Ever Done In The Name Of Love

My husband doesn’t even sleep in the bedroom. Neither does his brother. So what’s wrong if I lock the door after 10 PM to sleep? What did his brother want in the room at that time that it couldn’t have waited till morning?

The way these people are treating me is making me gradually lose myself. No matter what happens, my husband always calls his mother to report me, and they insult me. I am exhausted. What do I do?

—Samira

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