Whenever we have a misunderstanding, my husband seizes the opportunity to tell me there is no future for our marriage. He would do everything to make me feel I was forcing him to stay in the marriage. Meanwhile, you should have seen him when we first got married. He was like a fairytale prince. He treated me like a princess.

Don’t get me wrong. I didn’t expect things to remain dreamy forever. I’m an adult. I have seen enough of life to know that even roses have thorns. However, I had it in mind that when problems arise, my husband and I would work through them; by prayer and open communication with each other.

Unfortunately, my reality and expectations are extremely parallel to each other. Problems started coming up two months into the marriage. It has to do with a recurring sleep disorder I have. I talk in my sleep. I have always had that problem. But when I got married, I developed another one. Sleepwalking.

I have sought medical help. I have prayed. I have fasted. I have entered a shrine. Basically, I have sought help anywhere I could look. None of it yielded any results. My problem still persists.

I expected my husband to stand by me so we could fight this together but he started changing toward me. He took advantage of every fight we had to stop talking to me. Sometimes he would ghost me for weeks, even a month.

I would do my best to pull him close but he wouldn’t budge. “Honey, we need to pray together,” I would say, “especially when we are fighting unconquerable battles,” I would tell him. His response was always, “I don’t like praying with other people.” I couldn’t have forced him. All I could do was let the matter rest.

It got to a point where he stopped involving me in decision-making. If I tried to push, he would talk to me anyhow. At first, I said it was work stressing him. So I gave him time to come around but he never did. That was when I knew that this is who he has become.

When I tried to get him to help me deal with my problem, he told me, “It’s your problem. Deal with it on your own.”  From there, he started making phone calls late into the night. If I asked questions, it would turn into a fight.

So often, I chose silence for the sake of peace. That didn’t help. It only enabled him. He proceeded to cut me off financially and emotionally. No money. No affection. I was just there in the marriage.

Although I have a job, I don’t earn much. The little I earn too, I support my siblings with it. So his money helped cushion the burden. The fact that he knew this yet withdrew his financial support should have warned me of what was to come.

Maybe if I had been prepared somehow, it wouldn’t have been a massive shock when he woke up and said he was no longer interested in our one-and-a-half-year old marriage. According to him, I have a spiritual husband. That’s why he wants to leave.

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He said he couldn’t fight the spiritual husband. So he called my parents and told them he was done with the marriage. I pleaded with him not to give up on us; “Let’s pray. Let’s talk to people. Who knows where our help will come from?” It all fell on deaf ears.

He claims my parents gave me the spiritual husband. I also told him, “Maybe it’s your family that gave it to me.” I  added that it could also come from another person outside both our families. It could be anyone who doesn’t want us to be happy. “It could even be that you have a spiritual wife or a force after our marriage.”

She Invited All My Friends To The Wedding Except Me

Despite our back and forth, I can see clearly that he is acting up because of another woman. Whoever that woman was must be powerful. She’s got him so hooked that this man opened his mouth and told me that my mission in our marriage is to kill him. How did we even get to this point?

My question now is, is this how marriage is supposed to be? All the “I love you and I will stand by you forever,” is this how it’s supposed to end? I also want to know if there’s anyone here who can help me with my sleep-talking and sleepwalking problem. Maybe if I find a solution to this, I will finally have some peace in my life. And I will have a clear head to make better choices.

—Gina

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