For the two years we dated, there was no sign of another woman in his life. He told me he was single at the time he proposed. I weighed his words, and they felt true. I remember asking him, “What about children? These days, half the single population have a child or two under their sleeves.”

FOLLOW US ON WHATSAPP CHANNEL TO RECEIVE ALL STORIES IN YOUR INBOX

He laughed and asked me, “I have never been married. How would I have ended up with a child?”

I was glad to know that I got a man who didn’t have a baby mama. Word on the streets is that these baby mamas don’t always let the men be. Some of them were deceived by these men, and they make it their life’s mission to destroy every relationship the man attempts to nurture. I didn’t have the patience and heart to deal with all that.

Our relationship was uneventful. We understood each other easily and got along very well. It was no question that we were going to get married. There was no pressure from me, and there was no pressure from him. We just knew it when it was time.

During the marriage counselling, Elvis dropped a bombshell on me. It came out of nowhere. Not even I, with my crazy imagination, would have accidentally dreamed this up.

The counselor asked if we were hiding anything from each other. “You shouldn’t start your marriage on secrets. Come clean about whatever you are hiding.”

That was when Elvis wore remorse on his face like an unrepentant thief and confessed, “I have a daughter. She is three. I am sorry I haven’t told you about it till now.”

There was a lot going through my mind. I wanted to scream at him and call him all sorts of obscenities. I wanted to grit my teeth and ask how he could lie about something as big as having a child for two years. Instead, I barricaded my rage with sealed lips.

There was so much to say, but I feared if I opened my mouth, words would not fall out. I would birth incoherent screams instead. So I remained quiet as he begged and begged for forgiveness.

When I finally processed everything, I called him and told him, “You lied to my face for two whole years. I can’t trust you anymore. Tell me, in what world will a marriage work between us if I don’t trust you? The wedding is off.”

After that, I called my dad and told him, “I am not going to marry Elvis anymore. Please let’s return the drinks he brought to perform the knocking rites.”

My dad, who taught me the value of honesty, understood why I chose to walk away. Elvis, on the other hand, felt he should be forgiven because he finally came clean. He refused to let go.

Who didn’t he bring to me? My own family, my pastors at church, elderly people I hold in high esteem, and people from his side that I have massive respect for. Every time he came to me, he was accompanied by a third party to help him say sorry.

I insisted on putting things on hold despite all his apologies. He also refused to give up on what we had. “I was scared the truth would drive you away, that’s why I lied,” he would say.

After one whole year, I finally felt ready to forgive him and give him another chance. The girl was living with Elvis’ aunt, but after marriage, we agreed that she would live with us. I easily agreed to this arrangement because I thought if the child is under our roof, it would limit the baby mama’s interference in our marriage.

Although I don’t have a biological child, I have loved and cared for this little girl the way a mother would nurture her child. Everyone in my family spoils her rotten. She is a happy child who is loved by family.

However, I was concerned when I didn’t see any sign of her mother throughout the five years she has been with us.

The few times I asked Elvis why his baby mama hadn’t asked to visit her child, he told me, “I meant it when I told you she is not in the picture. She wants nothing to do with our daughter. That’s why the girl was living with my aunt in the first place.”

Just as our relationship was uneventful, our marriage didn’t have any problems either. That’s why I easily saw the changes when they started. One odd number became a constant log in my husband’s phone. This person always called at odd hours.

I was curious enough to note the number down and go digging. Guess who I found at the other end. It was my husband’s baby mama. Why is she resurfacing after all these years?

I asked Elvis, “Why is your baby mama calling you at odd hours? Does she want her child back?”

The look on my husband’s face after I asked the question shot a dose of anxiety through my veins. It was that same remorseful look of an unrepentant thief. The last time he wore that look was when he confessed that he had a child. So what now?

“She is pregnant again, and it’s mine,” he confessed. Once again, this man had managed to stun me into silence.

“What are you talking about?” I demanded.

“I am sorry,” he begged. “It was an accident. Now, her family wants me to marry her before they let me claim the child.”

READ ALSO: My Parents Says He Is Too Old To Marry Me

I forgave him the first time he confessed, but this is more than lying about a child. He had an affair with the woman he swore wasn’t in the picture. And now they are having another child? Am I supposed to stay in the marriage and take care of the children she bears with my husband?

I decided I didn’t want to have anything to do with him or his daughter anymore. He should go ahead and marry his baby mama so they can raise their kids together.

I Was The Man In The Relationship And He Didn’t Like It

I packed out of the matrimonial home and filed for a divorce. While I am waiting to gain my freedom from this marriage, people are judging me for the choice I made. They are saying I shouldn’t have left Elvis. “A good wife doesn’t leave her husband’s side when trouble comes. Marriage is for better for worse,” I have heard some say.

I don’t care about what they are saying. If I hadn’t listened to people, I wouldn’t have married him. I would have spared myself this feeling that I have wasted five years of my life. I forgave him for lying, so now he has cheated. What next will he do if I forgive this one? If it matters so much to them, then the people who are talking bad about me because I left the marriage should go and continue where I left off.

— Phoebe

This story you just read was sent to us by someone just like you. We know you have a story too. Email it to us at submissions@silentbeads.com. You can also drop your number and we will call you so you tell us your story.

#SB