I have been talking to this lady since July 2025.
We connected after I made a post saying I was ready to start a serious marriage journey and needed a woman who was ready too. She commented. We exchanged contacts. That was how everything started.
The way she talks. The way she reasons. Her attitude. Everything I have seen about her made me like her. I honestly thought I had found someone I could build a future with.
But something has been bothering me.
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Since July, she has never visited me. Not even once. She has never made the effort to see where I stay.
She told me she lives with her sister. According to her, she barely does anything in the house because they have two house helps.
Two weeks ago, she told me her sister would give her a break so she could come and spend three days with me. I was happy. Finally, I thought things were moving forward.
Then a day before she was supposed to come, she told me her sister was traveling to Dubai. So she cannot come again until her sister returns.
What confused me is this.
Before that, she told me the house helps had also gone on their break. So if the helps are away and the sister is traveling, who exactly is she staying back for?
I did not understand it.
Out of frustration, I told her maybe I should come and do the necessary things to get her out of that house because the whole arrangement does not make sense to me.
That was when she said her father and sister would ask a lot of questions about my financial background before allowing anything serious.
I opened my mouth “ahh” in shock
I told her that is unnecessary at this stage. They should first get to know me as a person.
Then I continued ranting out of frustration
I told her, “You are not even working or doing anything for yourself so we can build together and get married. You should be doing something.”
She is a professional fashion designer. She has her own industrial sewing machine and equipment. But she does not take outside jobs. She only sews for her sister.
Anytime I talk about her career, her sister, or her family, she gets angry. Those topics always cause tension between us.
After I made that statement about her working, she went quiet. About an hour later, she sent me a long message. The summary was simple.
She wants to quit the relationship. She wants to be single.
Now she is saying she wants to do everything on her own. She does not want me to be part of her journey anymore because I told her to find something doing.
I am confused.
She has a great attitude. She behaves well. But the issue of her family and career is something she does not want me to question at all.
Did I push too hard?
Will Make You Leave Me After Forty Years Of Marriage?
Was I wrong to expect her to be doing something for herself if we are planning marriage?
Or is there something about this situation that I am refusing to see?
—Burna
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