More than a year ago when we were together, I asked him to help me buy a phone and he agreed. The phone I had was breaking apart and he saw it. Today the ‘K’ will not work. Tomorrow, ‘K’ will work but you have to slap the phone a thousand times before K will work. Some days the phone will start calling my contacts unprovoked. If you try to stop it, it will go off and not come again.
I wasn’t working so times were hard. When he promised to help, I relied heavily on his promise but he failed me. The excuses became one too many until the phone gave up completely. For more than a week I didn’t have a phone. I fell on a friend who gave me her old phone. The screen was cracked but it was better than a phone that can begin to call contacts unprovoked.
My boyfriend couldn’t give me the phone but I didn’t hold it against him. It wasn’t easy, that was why I couldn’t buy it for myself so I didn’t expect it to be easy for him to buy it. We continued dating. I loved him the best way I knew how but he felt inadequate. He told me someone with money would come for me. Anytime something happened between us and we fought, he blamed it on his inability to get me a new phone. I wasn’t complaining but he found a way to feel guilty.
We broke up. One of those incessant fights broke us up. I couldn’t handle his insecurity and micromanagement of every step I took. I walked away. He said, “I know it’s about the phone but you won’t say it.” I chuckled and walked away never to return to him again.
It’s been over a year. I’m in a new relationship and according to the stories from the grapevine, he’s also in a new relationship. I have a job now so I saved to buy myself a new phone.
Days ago, I came home to meet a package. I opened the package and saw a phone. iPhone 13 with a cover note that reads, “This is the phone I couldn’t buy a year ago. I hope it makes you happy.” He ended the note with his name.
I called his phone but it didn’t go through. I tried to reach his phone all evening but couldn’t get through. I called his phone with another number and it went through. Meaning, I’d been blocked.
I cut the call before he could pick up. He called back but I also didn’t pick up. The phone is here, still sealed in the box. I’m asking what will make an ex behave this way. We didn’t talk after the breakup. Not even a text to say hello but he appeared out of nowhere to give me a phone. It sounds weird—more weird because he blocked me afterwards. I feel he’s up to something—something sinister, maybe.
Should I keep the phone or send it back?
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—Dede
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You already have a phone 📱, so why keep the other phone? If you know where he lives, I suggest you return the phone or send someone to deliver it to him. There is more to it. Besides you’ve seen his insecurity and other things that put you off, I don’t think it’s a good idea to keep anything that belongs to him because whatever he’ll give you has a price at the end. Be careful.
I think he’s only fulfilling his promise so there’s no cause for alarm. However, if you feel uncomfortable, you can return it to him. If you return it and he insists on you keeping it, you can give it out to someone who needs a phone or you can sell it.
I think it’s not a good idea to keep the phone since he blocked you.it’s a trap 🪤
I second that.
I would decline if I was in your shoes especially knowing fully well he blocked my number. 2, I think accepting a gift from your ex would depend on wether we stayed friendly and were in contact, I’d see no problem in accepting a gift or birthday gifts as well. If things ended badly and there’s no friendship there, I might decline unless my ex told me the gift was a show of conciliation… trying to better things between us. I’d want to make clear my acceptance isn’t an agreement to get back together though. It’s purely about friendship. Lastly, I won’t advice anyone to still keep their Ex as friends.
I would decline if I was in your shoes especially knowing fully well he blocked my number. 2, I think accepting a gift from your ex would depend on wether we stayed friendly and were in contact, I’d see no problem in accepting a gift or birthday gifts as well. If things ended badly and there’s no friendship there, I might decline unless my ex told me the gift was a show of conciliation… trying to better things between us. I’d want to make clear my acceptance isn’t an agreement to get back together though. It’s purely about friendship. Lastly, I won’t advice anyone to still keep their Ex as friends.