My younger brother was a quiet kid when we were growing up. He kept to himself while children his age liked to play among themselves. He barely spoke to his mates in school even. This caused us to worry about him. None of us in the family were like that. So we often encouraged him to make friends. Sometimes we would even point him in the direction of a bunch of kids and tell him, “Go out and play with your friends.” Nothing worked. He remained the same.
He was in his third year at the university when he decided to open up about his emotions to my mother. “I don’t feel like being alive anymore,” he told her. My mother urged him to explain himself. He said his mind was telling him to end it all and leave this world. “I am always thinking a lot.”
We took him to the hospital for examination and the doctors diagnosed him with clinical depression. Some medications were prescribed to help stabilize his moods. He seemed to be doing okay when he was taking the medication. We were also praying for God to step in and heal him.
We don’t know what happened to confuse his mind. My brother stopped taking his medication. He started drinking alcohol instead. Now he is done with school. He is doing his national service. At twenty-three, he is very intelligent and has a lot of potential to do well in life. The problem is his mental health.
No matter how much love we pour into this boy, it’s not enough to fill up whatever void he is trying to fill with the excessive drinking. We took him to the psychiatric hospital. The psychologist who was assigned to him prescribed some medications to help him. But as the saying goes, you can lead a horse to the river side but you can’t force it to drink.
The doctor does his job. He put my brother on medication and sees him every month for sessions. The other part of the job is for my brother to do. And everything he does shows he is not ready to get better.
He refuses to take his medication. Every month he goes to see the doctor but there has been no improvement. If anything, he is rather deteriorating. Now he goes straight from the psychologist’s office to drinking heavily.
We’ve sat him down as his family and spoken to him many times, but he is as he is. We keep praying for him but God is yet to show his hand. My brother always returns home from work, as drunk as a fish. On weekends, alcohol becomes his meals. He would get drunk morning, afternoon, and evening. These days he insults us when we try to talk about it.
The other time he made an attempt on his own life. If not for our timely intervention, we would have lost him. He is alive today but we are not relieved. How can we be? The danger is not over. We are terrified he might try it again. This is someone who goes about carrying a blade in his pocket. That single act alone has us on edge at all times.
We are all out of options now. What else is there for us to do? As much as we are concerned, we can’t force him to get better. He has to be ready to receive help. The fact that he is not doing his part of the work is making everyone stressed.
He knows how we feel about him but he doesn’t care. He doesn’t even talk to us at home anymore. After work, he goes straight to the kitchen to eat. Then he goes out to drink. I am still praying for him to change. In the meantime, we need him to quit drinking and focus on his medication.
I have heard there are herbal remedies for alcohol addiction. They say when the addict takes the herbs, they will never crave alcohol again. This is where I need your help. I don’t know how to get access to this herbal treatment. Can anyone here point me in the right direction? If there is any hope that this method will help him, then I am willing to get it for my brother before it’s too late.
— Ama
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What if you get the herbal medicine and he won’t take that too? Look for a spiritual solution behind him.
Hello Ama, I’m can imagine the distress the whole family is going through as a result of this. From my experience with individuals with suicidal ideations there’s always an experience that informs their thought patterns to take their life. If the experience is not brought to limelight to be dealt with it eats into them and causes them to involve in maladaptive behaviors if their attempt to end their life fails. And that is what you are seeing in your brother as drinking.
I can’t really tell if he has opened up about a troubling , however I am willing to engage him to see how I can help if need be.
Notwithstanding that , I will encourage you to keep praying for him like you are already doing.
You as family members also need counseling on how to handle him and the emotional stress that comes with dealing with.
Create a safe space at home for him reduce the comments you make about him and learn not to judge him as a family as that might cause him to avoid you or even relocate from home.
I hope your brother gets better soon.
You can reach out by using the contact details on my profile.
Your brother needs in patient psychiatric care. They’ll be able to deal with his alcohol addiction and depression together. As he is, he’s a ticking time bomb. He’s only going to get worse without help
Get in touch with Pastor Benji Amoah asap! E get why
Seek for proper spiritual intervention, we’re not battling against the flesh alone
Hello, Ama….You will have to ask the the right questions when you and him talk. And I think it should be just only brother to brother talk.. I can relate to that but it was my brother inlaw though
Hello Ama,
Kindly reach out to [email protected]
Thank you
I suggest the family battling alone in prayers wouldn’t help. It better you seek for true man of God before it too late Ama.