My boyfriend has a restaurant. Two years ago when we started dating, that was his dream so I supported it with everything in me. When he needed money and banks were not willing to give him a loan, I gave him GHC20,000 of my hard-earned money. He didn’t give timelines for repayment but he promised to pay as soon as business picks up.

All Carpentry work at the place was done by my cousin at no charge to him. I relied heavily on family ties and paid my cousin a token at the end of the work. I did cleaning, was involved with setting up the place, stocking and engaging with vendors. I was with him through it all until the place started operation.

It’s usually busy in the evening so right after work, I go to the restaurant to help him. He’s hard working and very focused so I’m not surprised the place is doing very well in a little over a year.  Now this is where things begin to fall off for me.

He hasn’t paid a pesewa of my money. I’ve asked him only once and he told me it was early days so he was reinvesting the profit. All the work I’ve done for him so far is at no charge. I’m talking about going to the restaurant to work in the evening until he closes at 12am.

He told me recently that the place was getting bigger so he would need my undivided attention. He would like to employ me to work for him permanently so I should state my current salary for him to match it. I told him, “My job is not only about salaries. There are bonuses and allowances. It comes with medical care and other incentives working for you wouldn’t match but I will work for you if I become a co-owner.”

We are planning to get married next year. Plans are far advanced. That aside, I’ve already invested heavily in the business for which I haven’t been paid. To me, it’s fair to be a co-owner than just an employee. He says I’m greedy and envious of his company that’s why I want to take it from him.

He threatened to pay what he owed me and also warned me not to come there again if I was not willing to accept his offer. I listened to him and withdrew my support. Now I’m the one to be blamed whenever something goes wrong at the restaurant. He keeps changing workers because none is trustworthy. That is also my fault.

He’s telling me I either work for him to build the restaurant as a family business or I forget about the relationship. My offer still stands. He still calls me greedy and envious and jealous. I want to know. Am I asking for too much?

— Frema

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