My boyfriend has a restaurant. Two years ago when we started dating, that was his dream so I supported it with everything in me. When he needed money and banks were not willing to give him a loan, I gave him GHC20,000 of my hard-earned money. He didn’t give timelines for repayment but he promised to pay as soon as business picks up.
All Carpentry work at the place was done by my cousin at no charge to him. I relied heavily on family ties and paid my cousin a token at the end of the work. I did cleaning, was involved with setting up the place, stocking and engaging with vendors. I was with him through it all until the place started operation.
It’s usually busy in the evening so right after work, I go to the restaurant to help him. He’s hard working and very focused so I’m not surprised the place is doing very well in a little over a year. Now this is where things begin to fall off for me.
He hasn’t paid a pesewa of my money. I’ve asked him only once and he told me it was early days so he was reinvesting the profit. All the work I’ve done for him so far is at no charge. I’m talking about going to the restaurant to work in the evening until he closes at 12am.
He told me recently that the place was getting bigger so he would need my undivided attention. He would like to employ me to work for him permanently so I should state my current salary for him to match it. I told him, “My job is not only about salaries. There are bonuses and allowances. It comes with medical care and other incentives working for you wouldn’t match but I will work for you if I become a co-owner.”
We are planning to get married next year. Plans are far advanced. That aside, I’ve already invested heavily in the business for which I haven’t been paid. To me, it’s fair to be a co-owner than just an employee. He says I’m greedy and envious of his company that’s why I want to take it from him.
He threatened to pay what he owed me and also warned me not to come there again if I was not willing to accept his offer. I listened to him and withdrew my support. Now I’m the one to be blamed whenever something goes wrong at the restaurant. He keeps changing workers because none is trustworthy. That is also my fault.
Six Years Later, His Ex Is Still In The Picture
He’s telling me I either work for him to build the restaurant as a family business or I forget about the relationship. My offer still stands. He still calls me greedy and envious and jealous. I want to know. Am I asking for too much?
— Frema
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Leave this opportunistic fool immediately, but let him repay every pesewa that he owes you first. Don’t pity him, drag him for your money and involve the authorities if needed.
Crema,it’s a red flag for you to quit the relationship if need be report him to law enforcement agents to get your money back.You don’t deserve such a person
Not at all, you are not. These are some of the reasons many women are not willing to be supportive of their partners even the married.
You are not greedy, you are not the cause of his problems. And keep standing firm to your offer. Oftentimes I say this, many women have the favor that falls on their men. They benefit from these favors of their women and when you are good to them, all things works well for you as a man. Same with favored men who come into the lives of women- they benefit from their favor.
Threatening to end the relationship because you don’t want to work for his company. Sister, focus on your current job, remember your effort of Ghs20,000.00 which you supported him came from.
#Remainfirm God will not forsake you. He knows your heart.
Rightly said
Hello there . I admire your heart for going arms length to support the vision, this is very commendable. Now to the issue to that, I believe is always best to have a signed agreement binding you both similar to what is done in marriage. It identifies as a sign of commitment towards the purpose or goal. From the story, seek legal advice and work out a contract that works for you both, even if it will affect the relationship at this point, you would have to count your losses and move on. But don’t lose your value of going out for an investment or purpose you see value in, kindly seek all the needed counsel in matters as such. God bless you and give you a partner your visions align. All the best of luck . Regards
Hey sister take your money.He is being manipulative. Red flag.
My dear Frema,please don’t accept his offer,don’t leave your job,and moreover take your hard earned money,ghc20,000 is alot of money you can start a side business with for yourself, he’s an opportunist and manipulative as well