I have been dating my girlfriend for the past four years. She is twenty-two, and I am twenty-six. We have had our first share of problems but the problems never conquered us. We always came out of every situation with a stronger bond. She completed the university just recently and she is doing her national service. I supported her while she was in school although I don’t make a lot of money from my business. Due to my responsibility toward her, it became difficult for me to save enough money to marry her after she completed school as we had planned.

I felt the only other way I could gather money to marry her was to put my land up for sale. So I have done just that. While I wait for someone to come and buy the land, I have a little situation on my hands. All of this began when my niece came to visit me. She is the daughter of my eldest sister, and I happen to be the last born among nine children. Because of this, I am only five years older than her.

At the end of her visit she told me, “Uncle, I need a job. I am done with fashion school but I don’t have the resources it takes to start something of my own. So I am hoping to work for someone.” I assured her, “I have a friend who owns a fashion designing business. I will speak to him to see if he is hiring.” I spoke to my friend and he was willing to hire her. So my niece made arrangements and moved to town to work with my friend. I took her to a family house that was close enough to the shop so she wouldn’t have to spend money on rent.

After one month of staying with them, she told me the grandmother of the family asked her to sleep on the couch in the hall. “Uncle, it is so uncomfortable. I have started getting back pain.” I consoled her and asked her to hang in there. Later, I was having a conversation with my girlfriend when my niece came up. I told her about the couch and my niece’s back pain. My girlfriend responded, “Why don’t you ask her to come and live with you? You have a spare room here so she can stay in it.”

So I let my niece move in with me. The first night she wouldn’t stop talking about how much her back hurt. She then came to me, “Please can you massage it for me? If not I can’t sleep.” I massaged her that very day and she said she felt better. Since then, any time her back hurt she would ask me to massage her. I would do my magic and her pain would go away.

Just recently, she asked me to massage her again. While I was doing it she told me, “Please move lower. That place hurt too.” Lower meant the upper part of her butt. She is my niece, I have never seen her in a sexual way so I didn’t see a problem with massaging her there. She moved her waist beads out of the way so I could get on with the massage. I was in the middle of the massage when I realized a part of me had risen to full attention. The whole thing became confusing for me. I didn’t see her in a sexual way so why was my body reacting to her like that? The next thing I knew, I was close to penetrating her.

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I came to my senses immediately I realized what I was about to do. I felt so embarrassed. “Forgive me,” I told her, “I don’t understand why this is happening.” She didn’t talk to me after I apologized, and we have been living like strangers since then. The guilt of my actions weighed heavily on me, so I confessed to my girlfriend. She was angry. She wanted to even end our relationship, “I can’t trust you around your own niece? Then what about all the women you are not related to? What will you do with them when the opportunity presents itself?”

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I did a fair amount of groveling until she changed her mind about leaving me. She however gave me a condition for reconsidering her decision. “You have proven that you cannot control yourself around her so let her leave. If you don’t, I will definitely leave you.” This is where I see a problem. I love my girlfriend very much and I cannot stand to lose her. She has been loyal, supportive, and caring throughout our four years of dating. I don’t even think there’s someone out there like her for me. Everything about her is what I need in a woman. But how do I throw my niece out of my place just because of something I did?

It isn’t that I don’t want to let her leave, I do. The problem is, what excuse do I give her? We are after all family, I have to sack her in a way that wouldn’t look like I am sacking her. I thought of telling her that I am getting married, but I haven’t sold the land yet so I am nowhere near ready for marriage. I can not also tell her that my girlfriend wants her out of my place. I also do not want to waste too much time with this and lose my girlfriend. So what do I do?

–Jonas

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