I woke up at dawn and found myself typing into Google search, “How long after delivery can I start ‘knacking’ my wife?”
The first answer was, “Most doctors recommend four to six weeks.” And then the rest went like, “It’s not definitive. It depends on blah blah blah.”
FOLLOW US ON WHATSAPP CHANNEL TO RECEIVE ALL STORIES IN YOUR INBOX
It’s this grey area my wife is using to deny me my ‘knacking’ rights. Our baby is two months old, but we stopped doing it long before delivery. If I’m not exaggerating, we stopped even before she entered the third trimester of the pregnancy. She didn’t want it. She pushed me away whenever I tried. I couldn’t force it, so I stopped and waited patiently after delivery.
Now that the baby is here, every night brings different excuses:
“I’m still not totally healed.”
“I have pains down and up there.”
“Can’t you wait a little longer?”
The closest hope she gave me was when she asked me to carry the baby until she slept so we could do it. I did my best, and I think the baby also sensed my suffering, so she didn’t take too long to sleep.
When I put the baby down, she tightened up and said she was tired and sleepy, so I should wait till dawn. At dawn, when I woke up, the baby was busy suckling, so I had to coil back into my shell.
I feel she’s making up excuses. She’ll complain about pain and still tell me she won’t go to the hospital because she’ll be fine. It’s been over five months. These days, I get angry very easily at work. I lose my appetite for no apparent reason. She’ll sleep naked and tease my desires but still give me excuses.
I’m here trying to figure out what else I can do to get her to at least give me a few seconds of action. The way I haven’t done it for so long, I don’t think I’ll even last—just a few seconds and I’m done. But my wife is being wicked.
You Broke Me Into Pieces: A Daughter’s Emotional Conversation With Her Father
Is that how it is in every home? Dads, is that how the mummihood gang treats you at night after delivery? If that’s the case, then I think this will be our first and last baby because what is this?
—Collins
This story you just read was sent to us by someone just like you. We know you have a story too. Email it to us at submissions@silentbeads.com. You can also drop your number and we will call you so you tell us your story.
******
hmm, people says marriage controls fornication but see what this man is going through. May God give u the strength and patience
Well for your information, marriage doesn’t control fornication. If one doesn’t repent from whatever he’s struggling with as a single person, he or she takes it to marriage. That’s why a cheater, if he doesn’t repair his ways, marries and still cheats.
That been said, I think the writer needs to exercise patience with the wife. Kind you, every woman experiences child birth differently. The fact that Google has given you an information doesn’t mean Google is your wife.
From the write up, it seems it’s just you and your wife with the baby. Your wife needs all the help she can get. If any trusted family member can come around to help, that would be great.
If she delivered via CS too, talk to some nurses and see how best the pain she’s feeling can subside.
Wishing you the best
Please take it easy with her i understand her pain its not easy to deliv a baby but at least she should give 2 times in week
Traditionally, the waiting period is 3 months. And the woman goes to live with her mother or mother comes over. Go with what our ancestors adviced, they knew what they were doing.
If she is breastfeeding, her libido will be low.
Low libido means she can’t open her legs to satisfy her suffering husband or her vagina is sealed up after delivering. My wife had episiotomy during delivery but we did before 2 months after delivery. This is how some of you tempt good men to start cheating
Well not every woman is like your wife. Women experience pain differently.
Adjoa how ? Please can you explain
Tell her how you feel,make her know you are running out of patience,in fact let her advice you on what to do, because if I advice now ..
It seems she’s struggling being a first time mom and taking care of the baby. If you can get a family member to help her that would be best. Also if she’s still experiencing pain after 2months of childbirth, you should take her to the hospital. This is how we ignore minor pain and it later develops into something else.
No that’s not how the mummyhood treats the daddies but our bodies differ in so many ways and there’s no manual for how long it takes a woman’s body to be ready after birth. after the birth of my first baby it took me 10 months to be ready, the second took me 7 months, third took me 12 weeks and fourth was also 12 weeks. Give your wife sometime to heal properly and get her groove back up again. Kudos too for your patience during these times. All the best new daddy