I have only had eyes for one man for the past six years. He is the love of my life. The thought of doing life without him fills me with dread. I look at other men and I can’t imagine myself with any of them. If it’s not my Steve, then no one else is desirable to me.

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He made me a lot of promises when I agreed to be his woman. His favourite was, “Nothing will separate me from my love for you. I am with you till death do us part.”

I swallowed every single one of his promises like a starved child. In return, he showed me why he was worth my trust. He made sure I felt like a princess. His princess.

I never lacked anything even though I am not the type to ask a man for stuff. He anticipated my needs and provided them. He was that thoughtful.

He took me to new places. I love travelling, and so does he. Boy, did we make beautiful memories together. To this day, I look at our photos and videos from that time and remember how happy we were.

I used to tell him everything. Even if a guy showed interest in me, I would tell him about it. I felt comfortable being this open with him because I was certain that there was nothing he wouldn’t tell me.

The affection, the care, the attention, all the things that assured me of my position in his life started fading somewhere last year. I had a conversation with him about it hoping things would change. They didn’t. This man used to listen to me. He was ever ready to fix whatever was wrong. Not this time though. All my concerns fell on deaf ears.

One day we went out, and I tried to take a picture of us. Out of nowhere, he yelled at me to stop. I had never heard him use that tone before. It scared me. I couldn’t speak for the rest of the journey. He apologized the next morning but “sorry” did not explain the drastic change in his behaviour toward me.

It all made sense this year when I found out he was cheating. I didn’t see it coming. Of all the reasons I came up with, another woman did not cross my mind. I just felt the fact that I wasn’t doing it meant he wouldn’t do it to me. I was so wrong. The discovery completely broke me.

He denied everything when I confronted him. So I showed him the proof I gathered. Steve got angry with me for catching him red-handed.

“I have given you everything; my love, my trust, my loyalty. What more are you looking for in another woman?” I asked him.

He apologized many times in different ways. I’ve forgiven him, but the pain still lingers. I can’t bring myself to trust him anymore.

It doesn’t help matters that things have only gotten worse between us. Everything he used to do to make me happy has stopped. When I bring it up, he says I complain too much.

“Why don’t you appreciate my efforts?”

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I don’t see any efforts anymore. That’s why I’m sharing this story. I need advice.

It’s hard to leave him after everything we’ve been through together over the years. But here lies the case where staying also hurts. The worst part is, he doesn’t see anything wrong with his actions.

I Was The Man In The Relationship And He Didn’t Like It

He tells me, “People change as they grow. You need to accept that.”

I don’t see it as growth. I see us falling apart instead. Could it be that he’s just fed up with me but doesn’t know how to say it?

—Michelle 

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