It was late at dawn when the text came in. I was half asleep so the sound got my attention. The phone’s screen was on so I decided to check what the message was about. It came from a woman. A woman whose husband is dating my girlfriend. She wasn’t angry. She was thanking my girlfriend for confirming her suspicion.

Before we went to bed that night, my girlfriend was on her phone chatting with someone. She was smiling a lot and typing with speed. When I turned off the light, she put her phone down and we slept. According to the message the woman sent, she was the one using her husband’s phone to chat with my girlfriend and during the chat, my girlfriend made certain admissions that went on to prove that indeed they were dating.

The message ended by saying, “I will leave him for you now that I know the truth.”

I put the phone down quietly and didn’t utter a word. In the morning I saw her restless. She wasn’t cheerful even when I tried to cheer her up. She lay in bed again at a time when she should be getting ready to go to work. I asked if everything was alright. All she said was “Sh!T”

Since then she has been a shadow of herself and I’m also not happy but who am I to interrogate her? I feel it’s my fault that she’s seeing a married man.

I’m a photographer. A freelancer. Since we met, she has been a pillar in my life. She loves my hustle but money doesn’t come all the time. I can go for a month or two without a gig. I would go dry and empty in the pocket. She would be the one to provide; Food, transportation, buy prepaid for me and give me pocket money. I spend a lot of time at her end because anytime I do and I’m leaving, she would put something in my pocket.

How can a man in my situation fight my girlfriend because I caught her cheating?

But I wish she could open up to me so we talk about it and see the way forward. I’m not going to judge her. I will only promise support and tell her I will work harder to make it so she won’t have to see another man.

How do I go about this without making her feel I snooped on her? She’s a good girl going through a phase. I don’t want to lose her or make her feel insecure because I know too much about her secrets. How do I make her feel it’s alright because she has me?

— Charles

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