My friend Suzzie, She was a very good girl but life wasn’t always good to her. She had struggles. She was mostly fighting one hardship after the other. If it wasn’t about money, it was a man who promised her heaven and later disappeared. She had a mother who was always sick and needed special care.
Her salary wasn’t enough. Some times she had to borrow just to be able to afford drugs for her sick mother. I’ve known her since we were young and had become sisters. At one point we both agreed that her problems were spiritual. We just had to believe that because nothing made sense again.
I invited her to my church one Sunday to meet my pastor. I believed he could help because I’d seen him do it on countless occasions. Apart from performing miracles in the lives of people who are afflicted, he tried mostly to also provide for them. He paid medical bills for many, paid fees for a lot of people who needed it and even rented accommodation for the homeless.
Two things…I knew Suzzie would be helped spiritually but most importantly I knew my pastor and believed he could also help her financially.
After service that day, I went with her to the pastor’s house. There were two elders of the church, pastor’s wife and one prayer warrior. She narrated her problems and we all prayed for her. After the prayers, the pastor asked her to bring her mother to him the next day.
Everything was going according to plan. The pastor agreed to pay the medical bills for her mom and also agreed to find a proper job for Suzzie to do. All Suzzie had to do was to come to church every Sunday with her mother and also attend counseling session every Wednesday.
One night, Suzzie called me on phone, almost in tears she said, “There is a problem. Pastor left my house not too long ago. He wants me to be her girlfriend.” I screamed out; “Huh! Are you serious? How can you say such a thing?” She responded, “You’ve known me all my life. I share my problems with you. Have I ever lied to you?”
For close to a minute I couldn’t utter a word. I and Suzzie had become very close to the pastor’s wife. She was even mentoring us to take up positions in the church. How were we going to face her knowing what we knew?
I asked Suzzie, who was sobbing on the phone; “So what are you going to do?” She answered, “I don’t know. I can’t simply think right now. Do you think if I say no, he would stop everything that he’s been doing for me?”
I had no answer to that question so I told her to pray about it. We were only hoping that somehow, Pastor would see reason and stop pestering Suzzie but he never did. He was always asking Suzzie to meet him at one place or the other. Sometimes, in a hotel. Here I was, thinking Suzzie’s problems would be over after seeing my pastor. Rather, I placed her in another problem bigger than before.
He started sending naked photos to Suzzie and narrated how good he was in bed and how he was going to “rock her world” if given the chance.
At some point, Suzzie had to make a decision. She chose to say yes to the pastor. The day she told me I got broken. I kept saying, “No Suzzie, you can’t do that to the pastor’s wife. She’s been nothing but a good mentor to us. This is not how to repay her.”
Everything changed from that point on. She stopped coming to church and preferred meeting the pastor in hotels. She stopped talking to me and cut all connections with me. I knew that was the pastor’s idea. He got her a new place and mostly spent his times with her.
I spoke to a few friends about it who encouraged me to inform the church elders and the pastor’s wife. It wasn’t an easy thing to do but one day, I decided to reveal the whole thing to the wife. I sent her a message; “Mom, after meeting this evening, could I have some minutes with you to discuss some personal issues?” She responded, “Why not?”
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That evening during the meeting I couldn’t think about anything but what I was about to do. I got frozen with fear and kept asking a lot of what ifs. After the meeting, she walked to me and said; “It’s everything alright with you? Come let’s talk.” I walked with her to her office and started; “Mom, there’s something going on that I want you to know…” I took a long breath in and exhaled loudly. I continued, “I’ve been praying for a husband for the last three years but nothing is happening. Men who come my way are all heartbreakers. I need you to intercede on my behalf. I’m growing but no man.”
She looked into my eyes and said, “My daughter, the devil is a liar. He can’t take away the groom the almighty is preparing for you.. blah blah blah blah.” She prayed for me and I left. I couldn’t say a thing and today, Suzzie still remains the side chick of my pastor. Sad!
—Enyonam, -Ghana
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Please be courageous and inform the pastor’ s wife or an elder in the church. Meanwhile, get ready to leave that church
Be strong cos you are just not saving one’s person family but you are saving your friend who at that moment think of how to save her mum but at the same time destroying her life as well. This will be the hardest decision to make but if not to the pastor’s wife please let your pple assist you. It’s really sad just to see pple we needed help from want to take something in return but to the shock of the story they are pple we always look forward for the best. May God gives you the courage to to save yours friend n help the wife also know who she is with all this while