My boyfriend had just graduated from the University when I found out I was pregnant. This was in 2014. He was ready to take the necessary steps to legitimize what we had but his mother had other plans for him. She said there was no way her son would marry someone who was not a graduate. It didn’t matter to her that we were in the same church. She just rejected me because I didn’t have a university education.

From that moment, I advised myself not to force myself into a space I was not welcome in. Everything we shared ceased. Even the pregnancy, they did not attempt to look after it. Thankfully, my mother stepped in and helped me take care of myself, the pregnancy, and the baby when he arrived. I didn’t receive a pesewa from my baby daddy and his family.

In 2017, I left the boy with my elder sister and moved to Accra to hustle. I started by selling water. I put my best efforts into it and saved as much as possible. When I gathered enough, I put myself into fashion school. I graduated in 2020 after learning skills that include making bridal fans, beaded handbags, fascinators, and wrapping engagement items. With these skills, I started an online business.

It’s the proceeds from that business that kept me going and helped me take care of my son. It was just the two of us all along. Then somewhere in 2022, my baby daddy reached out and started talking to me. “I want us to get back together,” he proposed. He talked about me, him, and our son together as a family. After all these years there was nothing left in my heart for him. So I turned him down.

He didn’t accept it. He kept coming back with apologies and reminders of the past we once shared. Eventually, I got fed up and told him, “Fine, I will only consider giving you a second chance if you start taking responsibility for our child.” He didn’t do it so that was it.

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He disappeared into the shadows he crawled out of and I also went on taking care of my son. Things were going well for me until someone I supported financially betrayed me. This betrayal hurt more than anything because it cost me some of the businesses I was running.

Things became difficult for me financially after that. I hated the fact that I couldn’t take care of my son as well as I used to. So for the first time ever, I called my baby daddy and asked him to take on some of the responsibilities. This guy is doing well for himself. He has a good job and a thriving business on the side. Yet he cannot bring himself to provide child support for the child we made together.

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He keeps running away from his responsibilities while things continue to be difficult for me. In January this year, he sent me an invitation to his father’s funeral but I didn’t go. I don’t know if that upset him and he has decided to pay me back. Why am I saying this? In August I sent him the bill for our child’s school fees. He promised to send me some money when school reopened, however, he hasn’t answered any of my calls since that time till now.

I don’t understand why a man who can afford to take care of his child is refusing to do so. Maybe he just enjoys making a fool out of me. Whatever his reasons are, I have had enough. I want to make him pay his due. So I’m seeking legal assistance. If anyone can give me some guidance on what procedures to follow, I would be very grateful.

— Obaasima

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