I met this guy on Facebook. I liked him right from the start because of the insightful things he wrote about and the sense behind his argument every time he was engaged in one. I was the one who sent him a friend’s request. I was the one who sent him a DM asking for friendship.

We became friends and spoke every day. Some days he gave me some clues the indicated that he liked me. Some days too he was just indifferent. We met a couple of times but he didn’t sound like he was interested in me. One day I posted a house party photo on my status and he asked if he could come. I said, “Why not?

He came to the party and immediately he saw where I lived he opened his mouth wide. “Is that where you live?” I said yes. Two days later, he came back with his friends to swim and I served them well. That evening, he proposed to me and I said yes.

All of a sudden, he was all over me, asking when he could come around and when I was going to introduce him to my parents. Apart from that, anytime he came around, he made some series of rich requests. Like, “Can I have this wine and that wine.” “Oh, can you send Uber to come and pick me?” He even asked me to buy him a new iPhone since what he was using was Android. I didn’t feel right about him so I gave myself some time to study him.

He continued making demands from me. I thought maybe where I lived was giving him the impression that I was rich. So, one day during a conversation, I told him, “This place actually belongs to my uncle—my mother’s senior brother. He lives in the US. We are just caretakers of this house. I learned he’s coming within a few weeks, so we’ll move back to Kasoa where we live.” I watched his face and realized he wasn’t happy about what I said. He asked, “You mean you don’t own this place?” I said yes. He asked, “So why won’t your uncle give you a portion of this place to live. It’s a huge house already.” I answered, “He has a very large family so we have no option than to move back to Kasoa.

From the day we had that conversation, this guy went back to being indifferent. He wouldn’t respond to my messages and he wouldn’t return my call. I would call his line and it would be call waiting. Several minutes later, I would call him and he would tell me he didn’t see my missed call. The relationship was only three months old. We were still at the knowing-me-knowing-you stage. The farthest we had gone was just a kiss.

Nothing was broken so I decided to pull out the plug. When I stopped calling, our conversations ceased. He didn’t call again. I was watering a dead plant all along. A month or so later, he commented on my WhatsApp status. He asked, “So you’re now living in Kasoa?” I said no. He asked, “Your uncle is still not back?” I said, “There’s no uncle. I lied.”

He said, “Thank God you’ve finally confessed. You see why I was not calling again? How could you lie to me right at the initial stage of our relationship? It was the reason why I decided to back out because one of your friends told me the truth. She said the place actually belonged to your father and that’s where you’ve been living all your life. In fact, I was hurt when your friend said that to me so I decided to back out of the relationship.” I asked which of my friends told him that and he said he wasn’t going to betray the one who gave him that information.

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Since then, this boy has started being caring again. He calls me morning and evening and even sends me lunch. Just three days ago, he asked me to apologize for lying to him. He said, “I love you but I can’t stand how you decided to lie to me so apologize so we’ll begin afresh.” I told him I had nothing to apologize for until he shows me that friend of mine who gave him that information.

Honestly, I still love this guy. Something in me wants to believe him. I’ve asked all my friends I know he knows, but they all said they haven’t told him anything. Now I’m confused about everything. If he left because he felt I was telling him a lie, then he has a case but I feel he left because he realized we didn’t have anything. Recently, he’s doing everything right and I’m tempted to take him back.

Please advise me before I make the greatest mistake of my life. Do you think this guy is being genuine? Or he’s just playing to the gallery only to get me to fall for him again. I’m quite confused.

–Deloris

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