Kobby is a police officer. I also work as a fire service officer. We met when I was transferred to his town for work. I fell in love with him hard and fast. I didn’t know what hit me. I started doing everything in my power to make this guy happy. Even if it was at the expense of my own comfort. I just couldn’t help it. Our relationship had a lot of red flags but I painted them green. I kept going, hoping someday he would start listening to me and our relationship would become perfect.
As time went on, problems from his exes started coming up. He was still in touch with them. He had other girlfriends too. When things became too much for me to bear, I broke up with him. But he came running back. “I am sorry. I didn’t mean to entertain all those other women,” he apologized. I forgave him but it didn’t take long before he went back to his old ways. He apologized. I forgave. The cycle went on.
On December 28, 2021, we planned to attend an all-white party. I was supposed to go to his place, so would go to the event together. When it was almost time, he called to tell me, “I just received an unexpected visitor so I’m no longer going to the party. Don’t come here.” I didn’t need the gift of clairvoyance to know that he had canceled on me to be with another woman.
I was heartbroken. “I don’t want to live anymore. My heart is tired from all the pain,” I said to myself as I made the decision to end my life. I consumed a lot of poisonous substances. By the grace of God, my friends found me in time and rushed me to the hospital. That was how badly his betrayal hurt me.
In January 2022, he crawled back to me bearing apologies. I tried to push him away but I couldn’t resist his charms. I ended up giving him another chance. Shortly after that, I got pregnant. “I am not ready to be a father. Get rid of it,” he said. I was in a financially stable place so I went against his wishes and kept the baby.
I took care of myself throughout the pregnancy. I bought everything I needed for my baby. Kobby only gave me GHC300 and begged me to let him be in the baby’s life. I didn’t deny him that. After the delivery, his parents asked me to bring their grandchild so they would meet him. My parents did not agree that I should go but I wanted to meet his relatives and get to know where my son comes from. So I went. They were lovely. They accepted us as one of them. After that visit, I still kept in touch with them.
Along the line, my boyfriend was transferred to a different town a short distance from ours. On days I was off duty, I would go to him. It was our arrangement until all of a sudden he stopped me from visiting him. “The baby is too small to be traveling by motorbike. I would prefer to visit you on weekends instead,” he explained. It was a reasonable decision to make, so I went along with it.
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In hindsight, that was the biggest mistake of my life. Kobby went in for another woman. She is divorced with three children. I didn’t know about her until I started hearing rumors that there was a pregnant lady living with my baby daddy. I went there unannounced and saw the lady there. Kobby sacked me that night to leave his room because of her.
When I left, I sent the case to his father. He was so angry on my behalf. He supported me. I can’t deny the love the family had for me and our son. They were good to us.
I Didn’t Tell Anybody Because I Enjoyed It
As it stands now, I am pregnant again. Four months. I was planning to terminate it but my mum found out and advised me against it. She then reported me to Kobby’s mother, who also advised me against it. Being a born-one was hard enough, imagine being a born-two. I don’t know how I can handle it. I didn’t grow up with my father so I didn’t want my kids to go through the same thing, but life has happened.
I sometimes get emotionally weak so I am worried this baby will make it more difficult for me to leave him. I wish I could relocate but I am finding it difficult to get a transfer. I want to move far away from him so that I can get over him for good. Please if anyone here has the connections to get me a transfer, please reach out. I need to break free from his hold.
–Sophia
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Common sense is not common.
He never spoke of marrying you after the first birth and because you can’t control what is in between your legs so you added salt to injury.
Reckless generation.
Carry your cross and wise up going forward
The red flags were many but you ignored all, he showed you his true colours and identify but it was your choice to blind fold yourself… It’s rather unfortunate you chosed a wrong father for your kids… Really disappointed in you!
I just can’t imagine how he crept in and dropped the second one again…… He’s got your charm really good. Well, live for your baby and pray to God for miracles to happen, you too can have a better story with him at the end.
Very soon this woman will say that MEN ARE TRASH but forgetting that her taste for the wrong man is the problem. All the indicators were clear, but you chose to ignore it. STUPIDITY AT THE HIGHEST LEVEL.I hope next time you will be WISE . In fact, you need WISDOM, not TRANSFER.
This is sad Sophia but it has already happened and can’t be undone….try to move on because even when he’s with you he had moved on….he knows you can’t leave him that’s why he keeps coming back….try as much as possible to move on…the transfer is good but be rest assured he would come back and it’s up to you to decide….in all this pray hard for God to help you out ok…even born 4 get good husbands…all the best
Where is your common sense. I pity your kids in this clouded delusional Era. If their mum cannot take care of herself to the extent of committing suicide of a cheating boyfriend who is her husband then you have a big problem. Madam you need to charge and take care of yourself, love your self and grow up. You are too immature. Start reasoning up and stop leaving your life as a fairy tale. Life is about how you make it and not what the society or anybody can make it for you or what it ought to have been done. Wake up and stop this gebbrish behavior. Stand firm and stop fooling. You are going to be a mother of 2, if anything at all live for your children and set good standards for them.
This is the 21st century! You shouldn’t have a baby by mere coincidence! If you must remain sexually active use protection. Get birth control and get it Now! Open yourself up to new relationships and let him know.
My dear you don’t need a transfer, you rather need mental health and psychological assessment because you’re depicting a case of mental health struggles. Drinking poison???
He will definitely come back crawling for you again. And that it’s never gonna happen again. This time around he’s coming back with a marriage proposal. If only you will remember my comment. It will be your decision to either accept or reject himself the choice is your.
eeeeiiiii gyimiiii nie boi
Ofui
Those raining insults, listen she doesn’t need that. Especially the men. You know how deceitful you men can be.