My husband didn’t want to have a third child. His reason was financial. When the pregnancy came and I told him, he said, “You know my stand. We can’t afford it.”

I understood him but I felt that was the most selfish thing to say. I wanted a third child. My reason was emotional. I had two girls already so I needed a boy to balance it off. “The girls need a macho man behind them, don’t you think so?”

Against his wishes, I went ahead to gave birth to a beautiful girl. I thanked God for granting my wishes. My husband didn’t like the idea but once the child was delivered, he embraced him and named him after himself.

Now, I’m the one regretting. Three children look like a crowd and they are too much work than I anticipated. The first is five years old, the second is three and now the third who was a year old weeks ago.

My husband was right about our finances. We can’t save. Our joint account has collapsed because we don’t have much to save. In a month, all three can go to the hospital with different sicknesses. That aside, I’m the one suffering to take care of them all by myself. My husband’s work takes him away for a long period. Even when he’s home, he’s too tired to help.

Last night, I couldn’t bath them. They went to bed looking like nighttime labourers. I may sound ungrateful but that’s not the case. I’m a grateful mom. I don’t take this blessing for granted but I wish these three were easier to handle.

At work, I bought a burger and chips and topped it up with a bottle of Coke. It was supposed to be a reward for my tired spirit, but I felt guilty once I finished eating it. I felt I’d wasted too much on food when I had kids home. I should have listened to my husband. I look at him and I feel sorry for bringing this upon us. He’s a man. He’s braving it with his masculinity. Sometimes he wants to say, “I told you so” but he knows it’s altogether not my fault.

This One Relationship Rule Has Save Me A Lot Of Trouble

I came here to rant while carrying the third child behind me at 3am when I should be sleeping. Tomorrow, I will be tired even before I get to work. When is this going to be over? I don’t know but I pray for a financial breakthrough so we can hire a hand around here to help. This is more than we can carry.

— Nancy

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