My husband and I got married a year and a few months ago. We were both virgins, having kept it the Christian way, and we were so excited to finally explore sex together. We were so happy, feeling like we finally had the ticket to enjoy each other fully. We danced on the day because finally it is about to go down
We even decided to delay having kids to build a strong bond as a couple.
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When we packed for our honeymoon, all we could think about was the good sex we were about to have. But things did not turn out that way. We tried several times, but he could not go in. After only God knows how many attempts, he finally did.
But we did not enjoy anything. It felt like a chore rather than the pleasure it was supposed to be. We were crushed and disillusioned.
Fortunately, my husband soon figured things out, and now he loves sex. He wants it often. He wants it in the morning; he wants it in the evening.
But I cannot say the same. I do not enjoy sex. I never feel the urge for it. After reading online, I think I may have a low libido. I tried to just accept it and continue with our life.
Now, I see that is not healthy. I have started to feel resentful when he reaches his climax and falls asleep, while I am left on the bed feeling nothing.
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My husband is his happiest after we have sex. He sings and makes big promises. If I do not take care, he can promise me the whole world. But because of my low libido, it is hard for me to get in the mood. I find myself resisting his touch and dreading his advances. Sometimes, I even pretend to be angry so he will leave me alone.
He is a good man. He does not force me. He tells me I am his safety net, and we spend almost all our time together at home. People call us lovebirds.
But I can see the distance growing. He is home, but he is quiet and lost in thought. I know this lack of intimacy is slowly hurting our marriage.
I need our relationship to thrive. Has anyone been through this before? I need your suggestions, advice, and support. Please help me.
—Joy
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The ladies that you see selling sticks and other herbal in market. Go talk to them. They have medication that can help. Once you saw you have low libido you should have googled for solution before someone gives him what you dred
I will advice you talk to your Gynaecologist run proper test before you take any medication. Dont play with concoctions,infertility and kidney failures.
Just give it time…You will probably need more foreplay and many more.
It’s just simple basically he lacks the skills and techniques in sex. He needs to learn what and hows in sex . Also you the wife has to also make your research and know how to go about each other. Contact me for books and video help. Thank you.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with you dear. Many first timers experience this. Even I did. You should not give up. You have a lifetime to keep learning and exploring to discover your sexual ability. I will suggest you get resources like books, intimacy challenge or talk to a expert aka sex expert for more insights. Remember, you are new to the whole sex experience and every newbie has had this experience. You may Whatsapp me on +233543296001 for books on intimacy like The Sacred Act by Azeezah Sadiq
Were you circumcised?I want to believe that there are some ladies whose Clitories were cut off at a young age, find it difficult to attain orgasm with their husbands.However, there are still other means of attaining it, like some persons already stated, take some time and read materials to enable you ascertain what could be your particular challenge.Most men are also not knowledgeable about sexual satisfaction for their women.Dont give up you yet.A problem shared is believed to be half solved.Take care.