Before you judge me, hear me out. I am not a bad woman; I am just trapped in an unhappy marriage. I am married to Eric, when I should have been married to my ex-boyfriend, Ken. This is our story.

I met Ken on Facebook. There were quite a number of men on Facebook trying to get my attention but Ken was different. First, he started making fun of my pictures. I would post a photo and my friends would post comments like; “You look beautiful, darling.”

“Gorgeous”

“Fine girl,” among others.

Ken would see the same photo and make funny remarks about it. He would roast me so badly about my photos that I would start laughing at the photos myself.

From there, he started teasing me about my favorite food and movies. I am a big fan of K drama and he found it funny. Every time I posted something on a new series, he would come and mock me. Weirdly enough, that is what made me start liking him

When he asked me for my phone number I gladly gave it to him. Our first conversation was on WhatsApp. He had a positive vibe, the kind that made me always want to chat with him. At some point, he proposed, “Sally, will you be my WhatsApp girlfriend?” I was confused by this proposal. “What does that mean?” I asked. He teased me for a while before explaining, “It means, you will be my girlfriend but only on WhatsApp. You can have an actual boyfriend in real life if you want.” I thought it was funny so I said yes.

The whole WhatsApp girlfriend thing didn’t last, because I became his official girlfriend. We were both in Colleges that were three hours apart, so we had not seen each other by then. Needless to say that we were in a long-distance relationship.

The first time Ken came to visit me in school we had our first kiss. It was actually my first kiss, and his first kiss as well. We were virgins. The second time he came to visit me, I allowed him to go the extra mile and use his hands on me. I was living in a hostel so we had no other option than to do our business around the school at night. We agreed that I would visit him next, since he had an apartment.

When it was time for me to go to his place, I gave him an excuse. I told him I had group studies that weekend. We rescheduled for the next week, and I came up with an important assignment that was due. We rescheduled again, and when the date arrived, I found another reason to cancel. It isn’t that I didn’t want to see Ken. Oh, I wanted to. I was just not ready to go all the way with him, and I knew it would happen if I went to his place.

Ken picked up on my reluctance to visit him and understood immediately. I thought he would get angry but he didn’t. He just picked a date and visited me, so I wouldn’t feel pressured. After his visit, I gathered courage and went to visit him next. He treated me like a princess and took pride in showing me around his school.

When nighttime came, we started to play. He said he had never been with anyone but he sure knew the right places to touch a woman to drive her nuts. “Where did you learn all this stuff?” I asked him. But he probably didn’t have enough brain cells left to have a conversation. The foreplay was so good that I also returned the favor. I put my mouth on parts of him that I never imagined I would. I climaxed twice before the actual shuperu even started. He lasted for two minutes when he was finally inside me, but I was satisfied.

After that night, Ken and I decided to abstain from shuperu until we complete school and get married. After what I tasted, my body objected to the practice of abstinence but I kept myself in check. I didn’t want to go back on my word and come across as desperate.

Immediately after Ken finished college, his dad who lives in Iceland called him to come and join him for a business deal. He was unsure when he would return. So we broke up before he left.

Years later, I married Eric. Eric was a good man, the kind who took his spirituality seriously. We agreed to wait till marriage before we have shuperu. Everything went on smoothly on our wedding day. Then came our wedding night. It was an experience that left a bad taste in my mouth. Eric didn’t engage in any foreplay at all. He just went in while I was dry and started humping away.

READ ALSO: I Know What I Am Doing Is Wrong But I Can’t Help Myself

At first, I thought it was eagerness from having to wait for so long. However, our subsequent intimacy sessions have brought me nothing but pain between my legs. I have had several conversations with him. I let him know how much he hurts me when he does it while I am not ready, but he does not care. He tells me, “Foreplay and romancing are for kids who have time on their hands. Real adults are too busy and too tired to waste their time on such things. We just get down to business and get it over with.” His behavior has been going on for years.

We have two kids now but he does not wish to change. Every shuperu with him is hell on earth, and on days I refuse to let him touch me, he gets so angry at me.

What Would You Do If I Died Today? | Beads Media

I have heard that Ken is back in town. The fact that he is married does not stop me from reminiscing our first and last night together. Honestly, if I had known that I would have ended up with Eric, I would have had Ken many times before he left for Iceland. Regardless, I want to experience that night with him all over again. I’ve already contacted him. I don’t mind kneeling down before him to beg him to give me one more memorable night.

I am a woman. I too deserve to enjoy what other women are enjoying when it comes to intimacy. I don’t care how my husband will feel about it, should he find out I cheated on him. Maybe, that will even grant me freedom from this torture chamber I call marriage. I just feel bad for Ken. If I succeed in my endeavors to take him to bed, then his marriage and his innocent wife might suffer for it. Please, advise me before I do something crazy.

—Sally

Do you have any relationship experience to share? Email it to [email protected]

NOTE: NO PART OF THIS CONTENT CAN BE REPUBLISHED OR REPRODUCED IN ANY FORM WITHOUT THE EXPLICIT CONSENT OF THE EDITORS OF THIS BLOG

#SB