I read the story you posted concerning the guy who wants to marry the Jehovah’s Witness lady. I read patiently till I got to where he said it will break Judy’s heart, and I laughed.

Well, this is my story too.

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I met Naa in SHS. Like most stories, it all started with a ‘hello’ and a ‘hi’ every time I passed by her class to go see one of my friends. She was an Art student while I was a science student. I remember borrowing a friend’s phone to text her after school hours. I proposed to her with my friend’s phone. She accepted, only to break up with me six days later. Her reason was that her church doesn’t allow dating people from any church aside from theirs. Ah, so why did you accept then, only to break up with me? I accepted my fate and moved on, but we were still friends. Then a week later we found ourselves in each other’s arms again.

We were young, but our love and bond was the talk of all. We both completed SHS and gained admission to different universities. Trust me, we were both happy. There was no day we didn’t talk on the phone.

Just after our first semester in school, she mentioned that she’s dropping out of school to study nursing. I was surprised, because she’s never mentioned in any of our conversations that she wanted to be a nurse or that she had a passion for it. I’m that kind of person who’s against doing something you have no passion for, so I tried to find the reason she wanted to drop out of the university. Then she dropped the bomb.

According to her, her dad went to one of their church meetings, and they were taught how J.W.s go to the university and indulge in all forms of immorality, so the father advised she should drop out of the university to pursue nursing instead. I’m not in any way against nursing; no nurse should come after me. I am not against nursing, please.

I was shocked by this revelation so much that it triggered me to go into Christian apologetics. For one whole year, I was diligently studying Christian apologetics, specifically the origin of the Watchtower and the Jehovah’s Witness Society, and what it entails. I’m not here to condemn anyone’s belief, but that church has deep-rooted cultic tendencies.

I remember giving her details of all my findings to give her an idea of the bigger picture, but for some reason it looked like she just couldn’t see it. We were together for almost six years. When we were two years away from completing school, I asked her what the fate of our relationship was, because there seems to be a hanging issue above our heads which needs to be resolved. We ignored it for years when in fact we knew that soon we would have to kill the cat in the bag, but we were pretending.

She gave the same reply that Judy gave to the young man. We’ll both go to our individual churches. Funny enough, that was the reply I was expecting. In my mind, I pictured how we were going to raise the children. What beliefs are they going to adopt? This was my major concern, so I brought it up in one of our conversations, and I realised how hesitant she was. One thing you should know about J.W.s is they get agitated when you challenge their beliefs.

When I did my research on them, I found out they don’t give or accept blood transfusions, amongst many other beliefs. So I posed two questions to her. You could ask the same.

1. Suppose we only have one child after years of trying to conceive, and due to a medical emergency, she needs to donate blood to save the life of our child because her blood is compatible. Will she do it? She flatly said no. Then I asked if she’ll refuse blood to the innocent child so he dies; she said yes. … Ei, you will let my child die?

2. I asked her, ‘What if I was also in need of blood for a medical emergency and she was willing to donate for me to live? Would she?’ She looked me in the eye and boldly said no, because it was a sin and against the word of Jehovah…. What a wow!

This same person that was moaning my name with every thrust and touch for five years knew when to draw the line when it came to saving a life, because blood transfusion, according to the Watchtower is a sin. Okay…

Marriage Through the Eyes of Millennials and Gen-Z

Chale, that was the beginning of the end of that relationship. It was painful, but I had to let it go. She was good, she was kind, beautiful, and perhaps more than all you’ve mentioned about Judy, but trust me, bro. This one is some bro to brother advice. Some battles are best not fought. Just drop your weapons and leave the battlefield.

Brother to brother, her love for you ends where her faith begins.

I wish you all the best.

—Nana

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