I used to see her around but I never got the courage to talk to her. I would just admire her from afar and go my way. Her workplace was right where I live so I saw her everyday. Sometimes I would feel strongly to talk to her but I would say, “The timing is not right. Let me wait small.” I kept doing this until one day I saw her walking home from work. I was on my motorbike so I offered her a lift. I was so happy when she accepted it.
That day I took her home. On the way, we had interesting conversations. This is someone I had always wanted to know. So I was happy for the opportunity to get to know her. The vibe between us flowed easily. By the time I dropped her off, we had become friends.
As time went on, we became close. People didn’t understand that a man and a woman could be just friends. Sometimes they would see us and ask, “Are you people together? You make such a beautiful couple.” We didn’t want to waste time explaining that we are best friends so we would just nod and say, “Yes, we are a couple.” It didn’t shut them up but it kept them out of our business.
Anne became a part of my life to the point where I don’t think about anybody else. We would spend hours talking on the phone. And we spent a lot of physical time together. We shared ideas on how to make our lives better. She encouraged me to embark on projects and chase what I want. I also pushed her to be the best version of herself.
We were perfectly happy in each other’s company as friends until I woke up and noticed that I was catching feelings for Annie. That’s even putting it lightly. I was actually falling in love with her. That’s why I didn’t have eyes for any other woman.
I tried to contain my feelings for her but the heart wants what it wants. Yet I was worried about how it would affect our relationship if I confessed my feelings to him. I would think about it repeatedly until I convinced myself that it was a bad idea. But you know how love works, the more you conceal it, the bigger it fills your heart.
One day we were having a conversation when I blurted out, “Will you be my girlfriend? I didn’t mean to ask like this but I am overcome by my love for you.” Annie paused for a minute before saying, “I am so sorry Joe. I have never thought of you like that. Besides, I have a boyfriend. So let’s just be friends, okay?” I was disappointed but I accepted her friendship. I felt it was better than not having her at all.
Although I know she is not single and available to me, I am not able to move on from her. Whenever I start to talk to another woman, I feel like I am cheating on Annie. It sounds crazy, I know. My mind believes I should move on but my heart refused to give up.
It’s been a year and a half since she told me she has a man, but I still don’t have a girlfriend. The other day we were talking when she announced, “Joe, my boyfriend and I are planning our wedding. We will be married soon. I can’t wait to be his Mrs Annie.” I gathered all my enthusiasm and uttered the words, “Oh wow! I am happy for you. Congratulations!” But my heart screamed, “Why didn’t you choose me? You could be my Mrs Annie too.”
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I used to hope that she would come to me someday, but now I know that I have lost her forever. What kills me is the fact that she has started withdrawing from me. I can handle seeing her happy with someone else. What I cannot handle is living in a world where she is not my friend.
I want to tell her not to throw away our friendship just because she is getting married. I want her to know that I will never do anything to hurt her or ruin her happiness. I will respect her boundaries as long as she will stay in my life. Is it a good idea to do this? Or should I let her go? Please help me.
—Joe
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You need to flush her out of your system by befriending a few more female friends. You have a lot of love to share. Definitely, one such relationship will blossom into something wonderful. Let Annie be.
God is wonderful. That’s why He gave us the ability to forget bitter experiences with time. People lose their parents and yet laugh at a point in time. Do you think they weren’t pained? Time heals so no matter how painful it is to lose Annie today, you will definitely forget her with time. For the sake of sanity and peace, start psyching yourself up and let her go. Broken hearts never remain broken forever. They mend with time. Stay stage my brother.
Let her go my dear, you will rather hurt the more if you continue this thing you call friendship. Let her go if you love and respect her.
God is wonderful. That’s why He gave us the ability to forget bitter experiences with time. People lose their parents and yet laugh at a point in time. Do you think they weren’t pained? Time heals so no matter how painful it is to lose Annie today, you will definitely forget her with time. For the sake of sanity and peace, start psyching yourself up and let her go. Broken hearts never remain broken forever. They mend with time. Stay stage my brother.
You need a woman in your life to feel that void in your heart