I was on my way to midweek service one evening in 2019 when a young guy stopped his car and offered me a lift. This is someone I didn’t know. So my first response was, “No, thanks. I can manage just fine walking.” He smiled and said, “Come on, I know you don’t know me but we are all strangers to each other until we decide to take the step and initiate a connection. I am taking that step but you have to meet me halfway.” I took a close look at him and realized he seemed nice. 

I didn’t get the vibe that he was someone who would hurt me if I accepted his offer. He was also persuasive. In the end, I chose to give him the benefit of the doubt and sat in his car. By the time he dropped me off, I had given him my number and agreed to be his friend. 

Through our friendship, he came to know where I lived. After his first visit, he started visiting frequently. I noticed that each time he came around he brought stuff with him but wouldn’t take them away when he had to leave. The reason he gave each time was, “I am trying to move from my place so I want to keep them with you for now. I will come for them as soon as I settle.” It sounded like a harmless request. That’s why I indulged him. 

One day I was at home when he brought his suitcase. I thought he wanted me to keep it for him but I was wrong. He was trying to move in with me. What surprised me was we didn’t have any conversations about it. He just carried his stuff to my place and expected me to make room for him. 

I tried to sack him but he was on his knees begging me to let him stay with me until he found another place. “If you don’t have another place then why are you leaving your place in the first place? Why don’t you go back there till you are ready to move?” “That’s because my place is haunted,” he cried. He said there was an evil spirit in his room that made him a womanizer. However, when he met me he stopped. “I also quit my job because it comes with too many temptations. All I do now is go on evangelism and fast every week.” He claimed I was his saving grace. 

Along the line, he told me; “I have a plan to better my life. I want to marry someone who lives abroad for papers so that I can leave the country.” Truly, he found someone and went through with the plan. 

While he was making preparations to travel, he made me take a loan for him. GHC10,000 with an interest of GHC4,000 upon payment. The agreement was that he would repay my money when he got to the UK. Before I gave him the money, he took me to his sister and brother-in-law who happens to work in the police service, and they vouched for him. 

The couple served as his guarantors. They promised me that they’d make sure he repaid the money. In his sister’s words, “I will hold him by the balls if he doesn’t deliver on his end of the deal.” I believed them. So I parted with the money. 

He left the country alright. His plan was to get to his destination through Istanbul but it did not work out. He said he was rejected by the Istanbul officials three times. In the end, he had no choice but to return home. 

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Upon his return, he tried to live with me but I said no. When he tried to forcefully stay, I found a way to kick him out. We were still on good terms after that though. I didn’t have anything against him. I just didn’t feel right about letting him stay with me. In all the other ways he needed my help, I was there for him. When he was hungry, I fed him. There was a time when I was the one fuelling his car. 

By and by, he got another opportunity to travel and he left. After this guy settled in, he started giving me excuses whenever the money issue came up. When I got fed up, I had them tow his car. He didn’t care. For two whole years, this car was hidden in a garage but he didn’t attempt to reclaim it. 

Marriage Turned Me Into Who I Was Not


Eventually, I found out he hadn’t even finished paying for the car. So the previous owner came for it and gave me GHC5,000. Now it’s left with a balance of GHC9,000. I went to his father who is an ex-military man and asked him to intervene. He told me he didn’t care. His sister and brother-in-law also turned me away. They changed their tune from “We will make sure he pays the money” to “There is nothing we can do to help you.”

At the time I took that loan for him, I was just a teacher who had worked for a year. It took me three years tears, sweat, and blood to pay off the loan. I don’t wish this experience for my enemy. My problem now is, what else can I do to get the rest of my money back from him?” Samuel, you have wounded me so much. Because you are a Ga, whenever I meet someone who is also a Ga I am wary of them.

— Sedinam

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