He always had a crush on me and I knew it. I tried not to get close because I also felt something for him too. He didn’t care that I was married. I cared about my marriage and wanted to protect it by all means. So it was always hit-and-miss between us. We would talk but if it goes deeper, I would withdraw.
We had the chance to travel together on a project. He sat next to me on the bus. We talked throughout the journey and the fire burnt us. He said, “We can share the same hotel room if you don’t mind.” I answered, “That would be too obvious if other colleagues see us.”
I got my hotel room and he also got his. In the evening he sneaked into mine and the first question I asked was, “Do you have a condom?” He said no. I told him, “Then nothing will happen. I don’t want any trouble.”
He rushed out to get some. While he was out I thought about the whole thing and felt like a whore. “And then what else? After this, who do we become?”
I got up and locked my door. I heard him knocking. I heard him calling. I saw his calls on my phone. I buried myself under the sheet and slept away. The next day he didn’t talk to me. On the bus coming home, I texted him that I was sorry. He didn’t respond. I texted again, “I think it’s not right and we rather not talk again.” He didn’t respond.
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I blocked his line. We came back to being just colleagues but I think about the whole thing every day and regret it. The fact that I thought of doing it makes me feel like a horrible woman who doesn’t deserve to be a wife. I see my husband and I feel ashamed of what I nearly did to him. It’s killing me. How do I get over that?
—Olivia
This story you just read was sent to us by someone just like you. We know you have a story too. Email it to us at [email protected]. You can also drop your number and we will call you so you tell us your story.
There’s nothing to forgive. Yes, you were on the precipice but you didn’t fall. Thankfully your platonic relationship with your colleague has also been restored. Quit feeling guilty. You did well!
Thank your God and move on. Some things are better left unsaid. But if you think you can confess to your husband then do so. But if I were you I won’t. Just pray to take this guilt away.
Do not beat yourself too much over this. We are humans and occasionally fall victim to one weakness or the other. Thankfully, you recovered your conscience and refrained from the temptation. Kudos! My admonition would be to evaluate what went wrong in the first place that landed you in such predicament. More often that not, this could reveal some underlying challenges with your marriage that could be very subtle at the moment. Fish them out and work on them before they outgrow their boundaries. Wishing you the very best!
Do not beat yourself up too much over this. We are humans and occasionally fall victim to one weakness or the other. Thankfully, you recovered your conscience and refrained from the temptation. Kudos! My admonition would be to evaluate what went wrong in the first place that landed you in such predicament. More often that not, this could reveal some underlying challenges with your marriage that could be very subtle at the moment. Fish them out and work on them before they outgrow their boundaries. Wishing you the very best!