I dated my husband for four years before marriage. The only thing he knew how to drink was water and soft drinks. I never saw beer bottles or any other alcoholic drink bottles in his house. After we got married, we relocated, and he made new friends in the community because he played football with them.

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One evening, my husband came home from town reeking of alcohol. “Oh, I just tasted a little. I wanted to see how it tastes,” he said. The next time, he told me, “Oh, I wanted to know how it feels to be drunk.”

His manners and speech were uncoordinated. He couldn’t even stand still. I gave him food to eat, but he sat next to it, dozing off. I took videos of him and showed them to him the next morning. He laughed. I said, “This isn’t funny. Slowly, you’ll become lovers with the bottle. Cut it out. Don’t let it happen again.”

But it got worse. Anytime he got a call from a friend and stepped out, he would come home drunk. Because he was new to drinking, he came home looking completely disoriented. Sometimes, I wondered how he was even able to drive home.

I pleaded with him to stop. Whenever he tried to step out, I begged him not to drink, but he would come home drunk anyway. So, I started blocking his friends from his phone. Anyone who called him and suggested they go out, I blocked that person and deleted their number.

I don’t remember how many I blocked, but there were many. I could hear him arguing and explaining himself to other people, telling them he didn’t block anyone. Even those people he tried to explain things to, I ended up blocking them too.

Eventually, he figured out I was the one doing it, and he turned the fight on me. I didn’t deny it. I was honest and told him they were the reason he was drinking. He disagreed. He tried to bully me with the idea of “headship,” telling me he could think for himself. My plan was to cause chaos between him and his friends, and it worked—until he changed his password.

She Invited All My Friends To The Wedding Except Me

Now, it bothers me and makes me anxious that I can’t go through his phone to know what’s happening in his life. I used to believe my husband wouldn’t cheat, but now I can’t say that for sure because of the kind of friends he associates with. If they can influence him to drink, what else can they influence him to do?

How do I handle this situation? I’m not saying he can’t have friends, but how can I keep those bad influences away from him?

—Efia

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