The house help confided in me that my husband had made several attempts on her. She said one day he nearly got her in the bathroom while she was bathing. This was only a nineteen-year-old girl. She’s the daughter of my husband’s long-time friend. I didn’t believe it at first. It was so huge to address it with my husband without evidence so I asked the girl to get a recording of him for me.
She got it for me three weeks later. It started as a phone call where my husband was promising her heaven and earth. She promised her GHC10,000 which I knew he didn’t have and also promised to take her to the university. That same evening when he came home from work and I wasn’t home, he entered the girl’s room and tried again.
When I heard my husband on the recording, I broke down and cried. I sent the girl to her parents, not because I hated her but for her own safety after I confronted my husband on the issue. Once the girl was out of the picture, I played the recording on our Bluetooth speaker at night when we were about to sleep.
He turned into a vegetable. He couldn’t move and couldn’t breathe properly. I didn’t say anything until he fell on his knee apologizing for his indiscretion. He didn’t blame the devil. He didn’t blame the girl for seducing him. He took all the blame and apologized for it. He asked what he could do to unmake the damage caused to my emotions. I cried with him and in the process learned to forgive him.
I only asked him to give me time to get over it and it’s been six months already. I don’t have any feelings for him. I’m no longer angry about what happened. I don’t even think about it. We talk, we laugh, he brings gifts and I’m always grateful. We go out to have fun. A lot has been done to rekindle the flame but anytime he touches me, my body goes into defensive mode. When he pulls away, I regret it but it’s not my fault. It’s so involuntary I wonder how it happens.
I’m Dating Him And His Mother | STORY BOARD
My question is, how can I force myself to love my husband again? I see the hurt in his eyes and he feels I’m still holding on to the past. I’m not. I’ve forgiven the past. It doesn’t hurt again. I’m the one who encourages him to send the girl money but I can’t bring myself to love him the way I used to. My body is revolting against his touch. Why?
— Iris
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forgive and forget about the issue. Concentrate on his positive sides more
consider his apology as great. It’s not easy for a man to regret
Don’t try too hard. Just give it time and be honest about it to your husband. You are not over his cheating just yet. He should not force it and neither should you. With time you will relearn how to be relaxed around him and since he caused it to begin with he should be patient and put in the hours.
Give yourself time, seek therapy, forgive him and don’t forget to pray. When your soul is not at peace this is the result .
Are you perfect yourself? Think about your short-comings he has forgiven you because he loves you. Try to move on from this. Cheers
Women are moved by words- could it be that he has said he s sorry but not said the words we all long to hear- I love you, I love only you, you are enough for me, I m satisfied with our sex life, …” Sadly a lot of people think sorry is enough it is not. Women need security, we need to fèel safe with you . I think you need to have a conversation- ask him those hard questions. Am I not enough for you? Will this happen again. When he speaks those words that you need to hear you body and your heart will trust him again