It’s been three months yet it still feels like it happened yesterday. I have tried so hard to forget about it but the memories live rent-free in my head. Day after day, and night after night, I hear his words echo in my head. And I wonder how we got to this place. I think of all the things we were when we started out and I cannot make meaning of how things easily changed.

When I first met Ishmael, he had just lost his job. He didn’t tell me about it. He painted a picture as though he had something going for himself. I put two and two together and realized something was amiss, but when I asked questions, he would evade and spin the truth. So I did my own investigation and found out the truth. He was unemployed.

With my new information, I confronted him. That was when he said, “Yes, I lost my job just when we met. I didn’t tell you about it because I was embarrassed. Forgive me.” I wasn’t mad. I rather felt sad for him. I said a few things to encourage him and assured him that everything was going to be okay.

He kept hope alive and searched for a new job. I also helped him by talking to people and distributing his CV to places that advertised their vacancies. No matter how hard we tried, nothing turned up. He became so broke that he couldn’t even afford to feed himself. As a supportive girlfriend, I took that burden upon myself.

He had never spent a dime on me but I didn’t let that stop me from providing his financial needs when he needed me. I bought his clothes, toiletries, food, airtime, and literally anything an adult male needs to survive. I did all of that without hesitation because I was in love. I never even rubbed it in his face or tried to belittle him in any way. I am stating this so as to clear any doubts should the question arise in your mind.

About a year and a few months into the relationship, he finally got a job. That was when he started showing me his true colours. All the little things he did to show how much he cared for me ceased. It was as if he was wearing a mask. And his new job unmasked him.

When I complained about his sudden change in attitude, he ignored me. On days he felt like giving me a response, he would say; “Why do you have to complain about everything? I know I am indebted to you but must you disturb my peace of mind because of it?”

He ignored my calls and barely responded to my messages. I spoke to him several times but he kept doing it. This attitude continued to the point where he started maltreating me. I felt like a piece of trash he had no use for. I was so hurt and broken. One day I sat down and decided that I cannot continue to allow him to treat me so terribly. I tried to have another conversation with him about it but it escalated into an argument. Out of anger, I said, “You are doing all of this because you have a job now. It’s not your fault.”

READ ALSO: When My Ex Came Asking For Help, I Gave Her The Money I Saved For My Wedding

The moment I uttered these words, I came to my senses. I was filled with so much regret that if I could eat my words that very moment, I would. I started apologizing immediately but he wouldn’t hear of it. He rained all sorts of insults on me. He asked me, “Why did you help me if you knew you were going to use it against me?” I accepted that I was wrong. “I didn’t mean for things to escalate like this. Please, forgive me,” I pleaded.

He refused to forgive me. He said things could never be the same between us after what I said. And that it wouldn’t be wise to continue the relationship. I was hurt but I accepted his decision and walked away from the relationship. The pain I experienced was not a joke. But I picked myself up and moved on.

Why Men Don’t Say “I Love You” To Each Other

It’s been three months since the breakup, and I am trying to heal. Once in a while, I think about him and I feel hurt all over again. I thought he would leave me to do my healing in peace, but no. He is currently in my dms making sexual advances at me. I am so angry that I want to curse him. His intentions make me feel he never respected me. Worst of all, those break-up memories have come flooding my mind. What can I do to make him feel the pain he caused me?

—Agnes 

This story you just read was sent to us by someone just like you. We know you have a story too. Email it to us at [email protected]. You can also drop your number and we will call you so you tell us your story.

NOTE: NO PART OF THIS CONTENT CAN BE REPUBLISHED OR REPRODUCED IN ANY FORM WITHOUT THE EXPLICIT CONSENT OF THE EDITORS OF THIS BLOG

#SB