We’ve only been a couple for a month but we fight every single day. I have tried to leave him but every time I do, he cries and begs me to stay. “I love you so much. Can’t you see it?” he would say to change my mind. Because I am in love with him, I am not able to harden my heart to his pleas. The painful thing is that the things we fight about haven’t changed. He wants to keep me but he doesn’t want to do the very thing that would bring peace into the relationship.

There is this lady who works at the same place my boyfriend and I do. That’s where we all met, at work. While Danny and I were friends for a year before we took things to the next level, the lady and I have never spoken. I have tried to talk to her but she goes out of her way to avoid me. We join the same bus to work but she has never sat beside me. I don’t have a problem with her determination to stay away from me. If only she directed the same energy toward Danny, we wouldn’t have problems in our relationship.

Anyone who has eyes can see that this lady likes Danny. It is only my boyfriend who refuses to accept it. He insists the relationship between them is purely platonic. If that’s the case then why did the lady introduce him to her friends as her husband? It has gotten to the point where every time the lady buys something at work, the sellers ask Danny to pay for it. And he does.

I complained. I picked fights with him over their closeness. Still, nothing changed. Meanwhile, when we started dating, Danny complained about some of the men at our workplace who were my friends. “I see the way they look at you and I don’t like it. Trust me, only one thing goes through a man’s mind when he looks at a woman like that. Be careful around them,” he warned. I thought I was being careful but this guy complained until I gradually withdrew from the guys. I did it out of respect for him, so why won’t he also cut off someone for me?

It isn’t that they were even friends before I came into the picture. If that was the case, then you could accuse me of being unreasonable. They only started talking a few months ago yet he acts as if he is the last man on earth, and she is the only tree alive. They refuse to be apart. Every morning when my boyfriend comes to work, he would greet me and greet her too. When he takes me to lunch, he would hurry up and return to escort the lady to lunch as well. After work, he would either spend long hours talking to her on the phone before he calls me, or he would talk to me first and call her after.

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He discusses his plans with me all the time. How his day is going, as opposed to how it should have gone. Sometimes, we talk about projects he wants to embark on. Guess what? He does the same with the lady too. How am I supposed to sit tight and believe they are just friends? This is why we argue every single day. Whenever we do, it’s always about the lady.

He has unlimited access to my phone. He reads all my private conversations even. I have nothing to hide so I don’t panic when he is using my phone as if it belongs to him. He, on the other hand, treats me as if I am a toddler when it comes to his phone. One day he visited me and left his phone unattended. The moment I went near it, he acted like a mother hen protecting her chicks. I didn’t say anything. I waited until his guard was completely down.

I Discovered He Had Another Woman But I Couldn’t Leave Him

When I read his chats with the lady, there was nothing specific to show they were together but the flow of the conversation looked like that of a couple. My workplace has about two hundred workers, so whatever you do people see it. He has assured me that the lady knows I am his girlfriend. I believe the way we behave at work should also tell her we are together. If it’s true that she knows, then shouldn’t she be backing away from him?

I can’t shake off the feeling that he is lying to me. What if he tells the lady the same things he tells me? “Babe, there is nothing going on between us. We are just friends.” This is why I have been trying to leave him. Even if he is telling the truth, my mind is too crowded from everything I have seen so far. Am I right to be concerned?

—Mommie

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