On my 23rd birthday, he invited me over to his place. The idea was to celebrate my birthday and spend the night together. We bought all we needed and got home around 8pm. Just when we were about to hit the ground running, we heard a knock on the door. He said, “Who is that coming to look for me at a time when I’m about to get busy?” He didn’t want to answer the door but I encouraged him to do it. He stepped out, opened the door and it was his ex. She screamed, “So you won’t answer my calls because of this small girl?” I got offended by the fact that she called me a small girl. Martin was twenty-nine then but I didn’t know how old she was that she qualified to call me a small girl. I’d wanted to respond but I remembered the fight wasn’t my fight.

Martin looked back and told me, “Go inside the bedroom.” I sat there looking at the lady. She was all dressed up but couldn’t dress her face to hide the anger in her heart. Martin ordered again, “I said go inside the bedroom.” I reluctantly got up and walked straight into the bedroom. I was inside there but I could hear whatever they were talking about.

From the story Martin told me at the onset, they had troubles and decided to part ways. The troubles mostly came from Martin’s parents. They didn’t like her because she walked around with a Tattoo on her legs. Apart from that, she didn’t know how to dress decently and had too many piercings that didn’t make his parent comfortable. They advised him to leave her because there was no way they were going to accept her. At some point, the girl got frustrated and insulted Martin’s parents. Martin couldn’t stand the insult so they fought about it and later broke up. Three months later, he met me and we became lovers.

When we started dating, she was lurking in the dark, trying to get back together with Martin. She would send an apology and send gifts to show how sorry she was. Martin told me all about her before we both came face to face that night. Martin was shouting. The lady was also shouting. I was in the bedroom getting ready to support Martin in case it turned into a big fight. 

The Lady: “So you won’t pick up my calls because of this small girl? What do you see in her? Isn’t she a minor? Why would you stoop this low?”

Martin: “It doesn’t matter anymore who I decide to go out with. What brought you here tonight? What can I do to help you?”

The Lady: “You have to sack the girl before I say anything to you. Isn’t her parents looking for her? You’ll be in trouble so let her go.”

Martin: “It looks like you don’t have anything to say so just leave. Call me tomorrow and I will pick up if only you have something to say.”

The Lady: “I’m not going anywhere. I’m the one who’s supposed to be in that room.”

The noise started getting closer. It looked like the lady started walking toward the bedroom so they were very close to the bedroom door when I heard them struggling. The lady shouted, “Leave me alone before I scream. I say leave me alone.” Martin got the key from the inside and locked the door. They talked and talked until their voices died out. He pushed her out of the door and came inside to be with me. My birthday was marred but I was happy with the fight Martin put in for me. 

A week or so later, I found out that he had welcomed the lady back into his life. I was disappointed. I wanted to curse him, fight him and break him into pieces but when he came to me looking like a lamb being led to slaughter, my heart went calm and I listened to what he had to say; “You don’t have to take it the wrong way. You’re the one I want. You’ve met my parents, they like you and they’ve shown that you’re the one they’ll welcome home. What she’s doing is much ado about nothing. If I don’t pretend we are together, she’ll continue worrying us. I don’t like that, that’s why I gave her a chance. It won’t end anywhere, trust me.”

I accepted his explanation. I loved him and wasn’t ready to lose him to someone else. He paid my fees and gave me pocket money whenever I needed it. I only had to call him and place a request and the next moment, he’ll deliver. No one will like to lose someone like Martin so instead of playing hard to get, I melted in his arms and we got together again. So far, everything has been good except that the presence of that girl gets on my nerves. I read their chats sometimes. She’s always talking about me and pleading with Martin to let me go. I don’t talk about her. I know my place in martin’s life and know the role I have to play and I do just that but this girl won’t let my name rest.

Whenever she comes around, Martin tells me. Sometimes, to make me believe that nothing is going on, he’ll call me and place the phone beside him so I will listen to everything they say. Usually, it’s all about the lady asking about me and how far Martin had gone with me. There was even a time she asked him if I was better in bed than she was. Such things get on my nerves and I want to do something about it. I want to confront the lady and ask her to take my name out of her conversations. After all, I’m not pushing her away though I’m the one Martin likes. So why would she try to go all out to see the back of me in Martin’s life?

That aside, the lady is richer than me. She has her own work and is able to afford a certain lifestyle. I’m still in school and only earn when Martin provides. The kind of gifts this lady sends to Martin always leaves me green with envy. She’ll buy expensive watches and expensive perfumes just to get his attention. Whenever I read their conversations and she’s not talking about me, she’s asking him, “The shirt I sent you, does it fit? Do you like the colour? Don’t worry, when I’m returning next month, I will bring them in different types.” 

READ ALSO: How Do I Make Him Believe That I’m Different From The Women Who Broke His Heart?

On Martin’s birthday, I bought him perfume. It’s one expensive perfume but Martin has never used that perfume. He keeps using the ones the lady sent him while giving me excuses as to why he doesn’t use mine; “Yours is too special to me so I don’t want to use it anyhow.” “Martin, I want you to use it anyhow that’s why I bought it for you.” He still doesn’t use it and that makes me feel inferior to the other lady.

Sometimes, I feel like I’m fighting a losing battle, especially when he tells me he is with that lady. He even posts photos of the places they’ve been to. He excludes me from viewing before he posts such photos, but someway somehow, I go through his phone and I see them. I’m getting depressed. I’m in school but I can’t learn because of that. Anytime I talk to him about it, he’s able to convince me to stay with him. He has a way of talking to me that makes me understand him, even when on a normal day I won’t understand. That’s why I’m sharing my story here to get opinions from other people. Am I doing the right thing? Does it look like I’m going to win in the end?  

—Casandra

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