My baby daddy and I live in different towns. I visit him with our son but it’s not often. One day he asked me if I was interested in starting a business. “A friend of mine imported some goods. If you contact her she will give you some of the goods to sell.” He gave me the lady’s number and I texted her. For some reason, her vibe was off.

Before I spoke to her I had a feeling my boyfriend was talking to another lady. And when I texted this friend he introduced me to, my instincts told me she was the one. So I lost interest in the business.

Just this Christmas, I made time and visited him with our baby. He went out the day after I arrived, and slept wherever he went to. It happened on two occasions. He left the house and returned in the morning. Both times, I didn’t confront him. I also didn’t do anything to show him that I was angry. I was just waiting to find proof that I was right about my suspicions.

I got hold of his phone one day. It was locked but I didn’t give up. I typed our son’s birthday and it unlocked. Lucky guess. I didn’t go into his messages. I chose to start with his gallery instead. Unfortunately, I found everything I was hoping to see.

I saw pictures of this same girl in her nightwear. There were videos of them naked in his bedroom as well. It was obvious they took the videos after they had shuperu. I couldn’t control myself. I got my period at that very moment.

What even pained me the most about their affair was that, the day before I found those pictures on his phone, he went out with our son to get a haircut and returned to the house with the girl. The lady greeted me, sat down, and started changing the TV channels. It unnerved me the way she was too at home. However, I didn’t react. I kept my cool till they left.

To think that this lady knew about me yet went ahead to date my boyfriend is what I don’t understand. She wasn’t even ashamed. She followed him to the house knowing very well that I was there. Why are people like this?

When I pulled myself together, I showed the pictures to him and asked him calmly, “You said she was your friend. Is this what friends do?” I didn’t wait to hear what he had to say. I just left to the bedroom.

It was hard for me to cry. I felt a burning sensation under my feet and my heart was rioting inside my chest. I kept asking myself, “Why would he do this to me?” The more I pondered over it, the more certain things made sense to me. Our plan was to get married after the birth of our child. And things seemed to be going according to plan until he started changing.

Things that didn’t use to upset him started upsetting him. When I raised the topic of our marriage plans, he would brush it off. I didn’t understand why he was behaving like that but now I know that it was because of this girl.

READ ALSO: He Got Married A Week After He Left Me

Now he is saying he is sorry. “Forgive me for everything. It will never happen again. I will do all I can to make things work.” He says I should give him time to sort a few things out so that things will go back to normal for us again. “How much are we talking about here?” He doesn’t know how much time he needs. He just wants me to wait.

My question is, how did he manage to convince the girl to be in a relationship with him when she knew he was going out with me and we have a child together? These are the answers I need. But I am not getting them from him.

What Would You Do Differently For Them?

My only problem is I find it hard to express myself when I’m in pain. I don’t know how to react when I’m been treated unfairly. This is a guy I go on my knees to pray for God to turn things around for him. Since that incident, I don’t know what to tell God about him anymore.

Deep down I want to forgive him but I don’t know how. Besides, how do I know that if I give him time, he won’t still end up with the girl and leave me all alone with our son? I haven’t told my father what is going on yet but he had a dream relating to the issue. In his dream, my boyfriend sent me and our son packing because he was going to marry another woman. considering all that has happened recently, I cannot dismiss my father’s dream. What do I do? How do I move past this?

–Melanie

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