I’m the last born of my parents so they never let me out of their sight when I was growing up. They are generally strict parents but when it came to me they added extra measures. They wouldn’t even let me talk to other kids my age. I lived my life caged at home. I grew used to it so even when I went to school, I didn’t make friends. I thought they would loosen up when I became an adult but the story is still the same. I remember asking my mum one day, “The way you people are strict on me, how will I find a man to marry?” She just laughed and responded, “Don’t worry. You are only twenty-four. When you grow older you will meet men.”

Somewhere in 2019, I was patiently waiting to gain admission to the university when I met this guy. It was my birthday and one friend from SHS posted my photo on her WhatsApp status. He saw me there and expressed his desire to be my friend. I barely had anyone to talk to. So I gave my friend the go-ahead to give him my number. He called me within a minute, and we talked as though we were old friends who had just reconnected. The energy between us was all cheer and laughter.

Our friendship was birthed during that very first phone call. After one month of consistent phone calls, he asked me to be his girlfriend. It sounded crazy to me. I told him, “I cannot be with someone I haven’t seen before.” He then assured me that he would visit me so I would get to see him. I let him know that I would only give a response to his proposal after I saw him.

After a few weeks, he finally made the trip to my place. My mother was at home when he came. I introduced them to each other and they seemed to get along very well. However, the moment he left she asked me; “Where did you meet this one? On your way to the toilet?” We both laughed over it, even though I liked him very much.

I waited for a few days after his visit before I agreed to be his girlfriend. “You are my first boyfriend,” I told him. “And I hope to be your only ever boyfriend,” he said. He assured me that he would never hurt me. I was so in love with him that I hung on to every word he said.

I’m a very jealous lover and things get to me easily. Because of this, I don’t want to share someone I love with anyone. I just can’t stand it. Kojo knows this about me. Once again, he promised that he wouldn’t look at another woman. “It’s you or no one,” he swore. That’s how I let myself go completely and fell flat for him.

Our first year together was very rosy. Just as he promised, he was good to me. I made sure I was also good to him. I was intentional about the things I did, so I wouldn’t hurt him. When I finally gained admission to the university, he was already working.

I never doubted him until he started saying things like, “Today, this lady at my office said she wants to give birth for me.” Another time he would say, “Abena from my office said my girlfriend is lucky to have me.” Every day he came with reports of what the women in his office were saying about him. The whole thing bugged me but I thought the ladies were the problem and not him. I was so blinded by love, you know.

When his birthday was approaching, we made plans that I would go spend the night with him and he agreed. The night before I would go over there, I woke up in the middle of the night to study for a quiz I was supposed to write the next morning. It was around 2 AM when a number texted me. The message read; “Hello, I’m Erica. Kojo is my boyfriend. I’ve read all your chats so I know you’re his girlfriend too. Stay away from him if you want to complete your school successfully.”

The first thought that came to my mind was, “Eii! What’s the meaning of this? Kojo has another girlfriend?” I called him five times but he didn’t pick up. Then the lady texted me again, “He is sleeping. Stop disturbing him!” This meant the lady was in his room at the time she was texting me. My heart broke in two at that very moment.

Seeing as he wasn’t picking up my calls I sent him a message, “Bernard, you’ve killed me.” As if she hadn’t done enough, this lady quickly sent me a picture of them together in bed, and indeed, he was fast asleep. From that time till morning, I cried like a baby. I didn’t want to wake my roommates up so I went outside and sobbed.

I hoped he would call me back. I hoped everything was a bad dream I would soon wake up from but it wasn’t. At 5 AM, I called him again and he picked up. With my hoarse voice, I uttered the words, “You’ve broken me.”

He tried to lie but looking at the way I was crying, he came clean. I was shattered. I thought that being faithful and loyal to someone would stop them from hurting you but I found out the hard way that I was wrong.

After that incident, he was all over me asking for my forgiveness. “She doesn’t mean anything to me. I broke up with her after what she did. Please take me back,” he pleaded. I loved him so much that I gave him another chance. I told him, “If you cheat on me again, it’s over.”

After level 100, I came home for Christmas. There was a street jam he told me he would be attending. I asked him not to go but he didn’t listen to me. On the day of the street jam, I decided to visit him without telling him.

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Lo and behold, I met him with the same lady who texted me. They were in his room preparing to go for the street jam. He was surprised. He couldn’t even speak. The only thing I asked him was “I’m not beautiful enough to be taken out right? Thank you.” I went home and cried for weeks. My parents even thought I was sick.

He tried to call me and explain himself but I blocked him and refused to listen to all his lies again. I’m now in level 300. I am still single. Even though people say that being single means freedom, sometimes I get lonely. We all need someone to share our happy and sad moments with. And I hope I find that person someday.

How I Met The Woman Of My Dreams

Just the other day I was returning from school when I ran into Kojo at the station. He mocked and insulted me. He said, “After you left me you couldn’t find someone to change your phone for you? You are still using the Samsung I bought for you. Are you not ashamed of your life?” He called me all sorts of names. The one that really got to me was, “You are a loser. In this day and age, do you think you will find a man that will love only you? It will never happen.”

When I got home I started crying but I stopped when I remembered that he is not God. I have just one year to complete school. And I am sure that when I do, things will turn around for my good.

—Esi

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