This shouldn’t be a big deal but the man I am sees it as a big deal.

I’ve been married for eight years with two kids. To be a man, a husband and a father hasn’t been easy. I’m in charge of everything in this house because I was raised to be a man—a man who provides. My wife works but I don’t care about what she does with her money as far as she manages well what I bring to the table.

It’s hard to be that kind of man, especially when I’m not a rich man so I understand it when some men want to do 50/50. But I’m not that kind of man. I will swim the oceans, brave the storm, jump over the mountains just to put food on the table. I’m the last to sleep and the first to wake up. To be a head is to serve so I serve the family.

Sometimes I feel they take what I do for granted. I feel they see it as normal when I do what I do. It’s rather not normal when I don’t to them. When I give things to my kids, they take them, jump for joy and they vanish. I give to my wife and she moves on as if it’s the normal thing for a husband to give. It got to me somehow but it didn’t stop me from being a man.

A week ago was my birthday. My wife bought gifts for me and also gave the kids something to give to me as my birthday gift. The first child came. Before he gave me what was in his hand he said, “Thank you for paying our fees and making us live well. Happy birthday.”

The second one followed with her gift; “Thank you for buying us beautiful things and taking us to the hospital whenever we are sick. Happy birthday.”

Then my wife came with them, gave me her present and said, “Thank you for being everything to us. In my next life, I will marry you again and have these same kids with you. Happy birthday.”

I was moved by the sincerity of it and it. As I said, it shouldn’t be a big deal but the man in me lifted his shoulders in pride knowing I’m seen and appreciated. It gives me the strength to do more and go the extra mile for this family I’ve been given. I don’t hear such things often but hearing it this once and the way I heard makes it special.

My Husband Doesn’t Know That I Know His Affair Partner Is Pregnant

Women, please tell us these things. It’s the only direct payment we may receive for all we do. It’s hard to be a man, please make it a little bit easier. Lift us with words and support and we’ll go the extra mile.

— Joseph

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