Dear Lady Yaa,

I have been in a similar situation as yours for the past three and a half years. I received the dreadful news of my diagnosis when I was in my second year at the University. I was told that if the illness was detected while I was applying for school, I wouldn’t have been allowed to pursue the program I did. I had no idea I had contracted Hepatitis B until I went to the laboratory in my neighbourhood to check my genotype and blood group.

When the nurse was taking my samples I said to her, “Please let’s run a test for Hepatitis B as well. I want to go for the vaccination.” The next day when I went to collect the results the guy said, “I don’t think the results for Hep. B is for you. Let me run another test.” He ran the test again but the result was the same. Positive.

For some reason, I didn’t cry or make a fuss about it. I needed to talk to someone as soon as possible so I called my mother. She was so worried that something bad would happen to me. That was my major source of stress. My mother’s fears. She became my problem in that regard. In her defence, she has only two children so she is always scared we would get into trouble.

At the time of the diagnosis, I was in a relationship. So the next person I informed was my boyfriend. I told him to get tested. He did and it was negative. We were so relieved. He was also very supportive when it came to my case. He was the one who set the alarm for me so I would take my medication on time. He never relented when it came to taking care of me. Although he is no longer my boyfriend, I still remember how much he was there for me.

I work in a company where we go for lunch at a particular place and time. I would be eating my food and my colleagues would make comments like, “Why are you eating with small stew or sauce?” “Why are you not eating your yolk?” “You like beans too much. Is it because it’s not as expensive as beef or chicken?” Sometimes I would just smile and say to myself, “These people don’t know what they are talking about. Only I know what I am battling with.”

While I am in a place where I feel better about myself, my mother is on my nerves about marriage. It has become the evening greetings she offers me before I go to bed. “When will you get married?” This is how she says “Good morning” to me these days. When she realized that I was not moved, she started saying, “Get someone to impregnate you and I will take care of you and the baby.” Every time my aunties and grandma call her to ask about marriage, she calls me. It’s hard but I try not to let them get to me.

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My dear Yaa, I want you to know that you are not alone in this condition. I’m thirty years old but I am not married or have kids. One thing I want to tell you to do is always keep this secret to yourself until you are sure of the person you are dealing with. Pray to God to always reveal to you the intentions of people who come into your life.

Aside from my mother and my ex-boyfriend, none of my friends at school got to know about this. My only concern was my roommates. So I asked them in a jovial way what they knew about the hepatitis B virus, and they all said they had been vaccinated. I was relieved.

He Woke Me Up At 2am And Asked Me To Go To My Mother’s House

I go out there and wear a smile every blessed day because God has given me the day to breathe. Don’t let the comments of others get to you so much that you will cry. Make sure you take care of yourself very well, especially when it comes to what you eat. I drink a lot of water and eat a lot of dandelion alongside other medication and it really helps. I joined Alpha Hour and NSSPPD and I have been believing and hoping that I will get my healing one day.

I don’t know how long you have had this sickness and your age but I want you to put yourself together and know that you are not alone in this situation, dear. Even if you don’t know anyone else in your shoes, I am here. I love you a lot and I am sending you hugs.

—Maa De

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