I Thought It Was Going To Last Forever But One Month Later, It Was Over

Kweku and I were together happily when he got an opportunity to travel abroad. We were both very happy about it, but before he left we had a talk. He said, “Grace, I love you, you know I do. But I keep wondering what my travel means for our relationship. I don’t know what is going to happen when I get there and it will pain me to string you along and keep you waiting for me. I have thought about it and I think we should break up so that we can both live our lives without any obligations to each other.” It was hard to hear him say those words but it was the truth. We may not survive the distance so we parted ways before the distance did that to us. When he left town I was completely broken. My friends and family did their best to console me but it was not easy.

Two months later, one of my friends introduced me to her cousin. “He is a good guy. You will see it for yourself,” she said. I was still in pain from Kweku’s travel so I welcomed the idea of talking to someone new. For the first month we spoke, he was really sweet. He is a doctor so most of our conversations were held at midnight, during his night shifts. My friend had already told him about my relationship with Kweku and how things ended between us. So he asked to know more about it, and I shared some details with him. We hadn’t met in person yet but I felt a closeness to him. I couldn’t go a day without talking to him and neither could he. I found it unbelievable that I was falling in love with someone I was yet to see. But it was true. I was falling fast in love with him.

He was perfect. He made time to listen and talk to me about things going on in my life. He would sometimes give me solutions to my issues and his advice was always good. After talking for some time, we finally met on 15th May 2022. After our date, he took me to his house. We talked, ate, and watched movies in his room. While watching the movie, ECG did their thing so it was dark in the room. The cover of the darkness emboldened him to move close to me. I didn’t protest when he did that, so he proceeded to kiss me. I loved it. At that moment I believed I had found someone to love me and help me forget about my past pain.

By the time the night was over, we had gone places and explored each other’s bodies as though they were canvases. A brush here, a stroke there, and colourful kisses everywhere. We made art with our bodies, and it was beautiful. It was the best thing that happened to me at that point in my life. He asked me to be his girlfriend that night and I said yes, as my eyes and face got lit with happiness. The next morning, I got dressed and went home, while he got ready and went to work. We said goodbye with a promise to keep in touch throughout the day. I don’t know if I walked home, took a car, or floated on the clouds till I ended up in my room. Everything felt so intense that I was sure that I floated to my room.

Later in the day, I called to check up on him but he didn’t respond. I waited for a while and called again but no response. That was when I panicked and started bombarding his phone with calls. He didn’t answer any of the calls. I became restless and began to ask questions. A few hours later he called to let me know that he was busy with work. An explanation that helped me to feel calmer. Things went on smoothly until a week later when he sent me a picture of his friend asking if I knew him. I said no, and laughed about the tone he used to ask the question. “It’s funny right, how come he knows your full name?” I laughed again and said I don’t know. He asked again “So how did he know you are my girlfriend?” I was losing my cool at this point so I asked him, “Why are you asking me these questions when I have said I don’t know the person? If you want to know something ask your friend.” In response, he said, “I don’t want to stretch this.”

He started ignoring my calls and messages from then. Sometimes it would take him days to reply to my messages or return my calls. So on 5th June, I asked that we break up and go our separate ways. I just didn’t want to put up with the way his behaviour was hurting me anymore. But, he came to apologise for ignoring me. He promised to put in the effort to make things work. We come from the same hometown so we both travelled there, to spend some time together and with our families. While we were there, things were good between us. He had to leave earlier than me so he could get back to work but we said goodbye on happy terms. When he got to Accra that Friday he called to let me know he had arrived.

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I didn’t hear from him again until Tuesday when he replied to my numerous messages with “Hi, how are you doing? I’m coping with life here.” I was so mad that I ignored him. I later spoke to a doctor friend of mine about his behaviour. My friend said, “You know how stressful our jobs can be. Maybe, he is stressed so let’s give him time to come around.” After the conversation, I texted my boyfriend and apologized for calling and texting him too many times and adding up to his work stress. He ignored me. Then I texted him on 17th June, to check up on him and he told me he wanted to talk to me. I said, “Okay, let’s get talking.” He then texted me, “Grace, I’m sorry I proposed to you. I don’t want to keep lying to you anymore. I’ve tried to develop some feelings for you but it’s not working. When I add life and work stress to our relationship stress, it overwhelms me. I don’t want to keep ignoring your calls and texts while you sit there and think you are in a relationship with me. I’m sorry”

The message broke me and the only reply I could give was “Wow!” I later tried to get him to talk about this but he didn’t want to do that so I just left it at that. I’ve tried to keep him out of my life and focus on myself and my job but sometimes memories of our one-month relationship come to haunt me. I text him sometimes or call him when I miss him too much. It’s been 6months since the breakup but I can’t help myself. It hurts so much sometimes that I cry myself to sleep.