Mira was already at the University of Ghana before I completed SHS. And that was when my insecurities started. She was a lovely person who would do anything for me so I got complacent. Instead of focusing on the love she had for me I started nagging her, “I bet you are meeting new boys in the university. You are planning to forget about me very soon. I am sure you are even dating one of those boys.” She never for once defended herself or tried to prove me wrong. She just said nothing. When my results were released, they weren’t good. My finances were also not good so I couldn’t attend any tertiary school after I completed SHS.

My insecurities got worse, and I expressed them by watching her like a hawk. Whenever she came home to visit me I would go through her phone and check her messages, and her pictures, to see if I would catch her cheating but I never found anything. As for her, she didn’t even bother with my phone. It was on one Thursday we agreed to meet at my place that she went through my phone. This is what happened. Before she arrived, my parents sent me on an urgent errand. When I was leaving I left my door unlocked so she would be able to make herself comfortable in my room. Upon my return, I found her sitting on my bed, reading messages on my small phone.

When she saw me she didn’t say a word. She just handed my phone back to me without closing the messages she read. I also didn’t offer any explanations for the love messages I was exchanging with the girl I was cheating on her with. I figured she would ask me questions if she wanted explanations, so I kept quiet. We had a beautiful day together until she was about to leave. That was when she asked, “Who is she?” In response, I wore my “hard guy” armour and brushed her question aside. She is not someone who likes confrontations so she didn’t push for answers. Our relationship continued as though nothing happened. I also didn’t break up with the other girl.

I was there one day when Mira texted me, “I need a GHC2 internet bundle urgently.” I was going to send it to her when something caught my attention and before I realized it, I forgot. When I finally remembered I didn’t send it. I didn’t also call Mira to apologize for not sending her the airtime. I was rather waiting for her to call me so that I would apologize to her. For two weeks she didn’t call me. I was concerned but I wore my “hard guy” armour and used my side chick’s photo as my profile picture. Shortly after I did that she called me. When I answered the call I started ranting about how she hadn’t called me for two weeks. She said nothing until I finished, and then she asked; “Nana, who is that lady on your profile?” I got defensive, wore my “hard guy” amour and shouted at her in anger, “You haven’t called me in two weeks but the moment you see another girl on my profile you called? If you must know, she is my ex-girlfriend from before I met you. I only used her photo to get your attention.”

READ MORE: My Mental Illness Took Everything Away From My Relationship Until I Had Nothing Left

She didn’t argue with me. She only said, “I will call you back in ten minutes.” When she called me again she repeated the question, “Who is that lady?” I stood by my previous answer and insisted that she was my ex. She then responded, “Nana, I have dated you for three good years and you never remembered my birthdays not to talk of sending me a birthday wish or even posting me on your status. For three years I never asked you for anything, not even for transport fare to visit you. All I do is place your needs above mine. I am a student yet I bring you food when I am visiting you. In all our time together you never asked me, ‘Mira, have you eaten?’ But the one time I asked you for only GHC2 bundle, you ghosted me for two weeks and then used another lady as your profile picture.”

After she finished talking I heard another voice on the phone say, “Nana, thank you for tagging me as your ex.” The voice belonged to my side chick. It was then that I realized that I was on a conference call.  I have lost both ladies but the thoughts of Mira not being my girlfriend again is slowly killing me. Initially, she was no longer answering my calls after that incident, but she answered my call after some days and asked me to call the other girl and break up with her while she stays on the line to listen. I was so desperate for her forgiveness that I did as she asked, thinking that would make her forgive me and accept me back.

The sad thing is, after I officially called it quits with the lady to her hearing, Mira also told me that very evening that she was not interested in me anymore, and that she just wanted a more painful way to pay me back. She was happy that she succeeded in getting me to lose her and the other girl. But the truth is, I don’t care that I lost the side chick. That lady cost too much money to keep. She was always in need of something, and whatever Mira gave me went to her sometimes. I had hopes, that Mira would come around eventually, but these days, she answers my calls and laughs at all my pleas. If I could turn back the hand of time, I would have corrected all my wrongs. I would have sent her a GHC200 cedis bundle even though she only asked for GHC2. If I knew better, she would have been on my profile throughout our three years of dating. I know she reads stories from here, so I want to use this platform to apologize to her.

I Didn’t Marry You To Become A Baby-Making Machine—Beads Media

Mira, my whole life is a mess right now because no matter how hard I try, I am unable to move on. It even gets worse whenever I call you and you sound like you have no problems at all. When I view your pictures on your status and see that happy and calm smile, I die a thousand times. Please forgive me and give me another chance. Dear Silent Beads family, I humbly seek your help to apologize to her.

— Nana

Do you have any relationship experience to share? Please email it to [email protected]

NOTE: NO PART OF THIS CONTENT CAN BE REPUBLISHED OR REPRODUCED IN ANY FORM WITHOUT THE EXPLICIT CONSENT OF THE EDITORS OF THIS BLOG

#SB