One hot Saturday afternoon in 2007, my then best friend, Christi, and I were walking to our usual Banku joint when a car pulled up in front of us. A guy jumped out of the car and approached us. He introduced himself as Alex and asked Christi, “What is your beautiful friend’s name?” I thought that was strange since he could have asked me himself. After learning my name from Christi, he asked me, “Are you related to the Nigerian actress Omotola?” I laughed and said, “No, but people always tell me I am her look alike.” “I want to get to know you. Can I have your number?” He asked. I didn’t have a phone then so I gave Christi’s number to him to contact me on it.

For the rest of the day, I couldn’t stop thinking about him. He is dark and handsome with a beautiful set of teeth. I couldn’t even sleep at night because his thoughts flooded my mind, something that had never happened to me before. The next morning I was looking forward to his call, so I asked Christi whether Alex had called but she said no. The day after that I asked her again and her answer remained no. In the days that followed I continued to ask her if Alex called and she always said no, with glaring irritation. 

Prior to meeting Alex, I was dating a serial cheat called Nath for two years. He was a phone repairer who slept with every vulnerable or greedy female customer who wanted a free service. He went as far as cheating on me with my own cousin, and that was the last straw for me. I broke up with him even though I still loved him. Nath came to my house after the breakup and took everything he ever bought for me, including my phone. That’s why I didn’t have a phone when I met Alex. So I was really disappointed that I didn’t have Alex’s number and he hadn’t called Christi. I often fantasized about him and wondered how in the world I was going to see him again. 

Every time I asked Christi, “So Alex hasn’t called me still?” She would say, “That guy is not serious. Forget about him and get back together with Nath.” After two weeks of waiting for Alex, I gave up and went to see Nath. We got talked and made up but the entire time my mind was on Alex. As if conjured by my thoughts of him, I ran into Alex two days after my encounter with Nath. He was standing at the same spot he met me and Christi the first time. He said, “Peggy, I have been coming here every day for the last three days hoping to see you again. Every time I call your friend, she tells me you are not around and then gives me attitude. Are you girls not on good terms anymore?” 

I was too excited to see him to bother with Christi and her attempts at sabotage. He also dropped the topic when he saw that I was wearing a uniform. He asked why I was dressed in uniform and I told him, “It’s my work uniform. I am apprenticing to be a hairdresser.” “A hairdresser?” He asked disappointedly. I nodded, and he took my hands and walked with me. He told me he had a gift for me. It was a phone. He said, “It’s my old phone and I am giving it to you so I can talk to you every day.” While I was happy about the phone, I was a bit sad that he kept asking me, “So you are a hairdresser, huh?” Somehow he couldn’t believe it. So I took him to my workplace and told him, “This is where I work. You can find me here in case your calls don’t come through and you need to talk to me.” After that day I stopped paying attention to Nath. 

 I got to know that Alex was in his second year at the university. He is so intelligent and seemed to have a solution to every problem I had. He is also very funny and liked teasing me a lot. There was not a single day he got angry with me, even when I tried to upset him. Although he was in school, he came home on weekends to see me, and every minute we spent together was the best of my life. He made me feel like I was in the dark with Nath and he, Alex was the light. He was so good in bed that I named him my young tiger. Alex was everything I could dream of. My life revolved around him, and he was always there for me. 

He introduced me to his family and his parents gave me a cold reception when they found out I was a hairdresser. His father asked him if he was going to graduate from the university and marry a hairdresser.  Alex responded, “ I don’t see only a hairdresser. I also see a beautiful angel that makes me happy and that’s what matters to me.” That answer made me tear up in front of his parents. Yet I couldn’t stop thinking about the advice Christi and my seniors from work had given me. They told me to get back together with Nath because he was within my class. They said, “You need a safety net, in case Alex’s family doesn’t accept you.” So when Alex’s dad said what he said that day I started feeling like I didn’t belong in their world. I knew Alex loved me but I was worried his love wouldn’t be enough to persuade his parents to accept me. 

I followed that thought pattern and the advice of my friends and made the most regrettable mistake of my life. I started getting involved with Nath again. Christi who was my best friend knew that I was in between Alex and my ex. What she did with that information altered the course of my life. It happened on my birthday on 6th  March 2008. Alex invited me to his house and we had Shuperu multiple times, then he told me he couldn’t spend the night with me but he could take me to the beach the next day. I had arranged to see Nath the next day so I lied to Alex that I had a work event to attend. Unbeknown to me, Christi had given him my itinerary. 

That evening when I left his place I went to meet Nath and his friend. I was with them when Alex called. I was scared to answer the call so I didn’t. Then he called Nath’s phone and asked to talk to me. Nath asked him who he was but he wouldn’t answer so Nath gave the phone to me. I said hello and he responded, “Peggy, can you do me a favour?” I said I’d do anything for him. He said, “Compose a song for me, and title it ‘Alex Is A Fool’ because that’s what I am to you.” I started crying, “I am sorry, Alex.” His response was, “Turn around.” I turned and saw him waving at me. Then he hung up. I didn’t know he had followed me. I was so heartbroken that I couldn’t speak. Nath asked who he was but I didn’t mind him. I just left and went home to cry. 

 I called his phone the next morning and he answered and spoke to me as if nothing had happened. I went to his place thinking we could talk about it, and he would forgive me. We talked about it alright, and he forgave me but he refused to take me back. He said it was obvious that I didn’t love him back with the same intensity that he loved me. So he proposed that we become friends instead. I didn’t want to lose him completely so I accepted his offer. He remained my confidant and bought me gifts occasionally.

 He travelled to America in 2010 and we lost contact the following year. I thought I would never see him again, so I moved on with my life. I met my husband, Jerry in 2013 and we got married the same year when I found out I was pregnant. I gave birth to twin girls and two months after that, my husband lost his job at the bank over shady deals he was doing with his friends. Life became so impoverished for my family that my husband became a taxi driver. My hairdressing business was what kept us going most of the time. One Sunday my husband told me that the caretaker of the taxi said he will be passing by our place with his nephew who owns the taxi. 

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It happened that my husband was in the bathroom when they showed up. And I almost passed out when I saw that the owner of the taxi was Alex. It’s interesting how my life turned out. My husband was driving a taxi that belonged to my ex, Alex. It felt like a poorly written movie, but it was my life. I was miserable the entire time he was there. But I wrote my number and gave it to him without my husband’s knowledge. Before he left he gave me GHC1000 to buy food for the kids, and my husband was shocked by the gesture. He didn’t know that Alex and I knew each other, and we didn’t act as if we did. 

 Later, I visited him in his hotel and we talked and reminisced. We also laughed about the fact that life and hardships had ruined my Omotola looks. He told me Christi had been sending him love messages but he never paid attention to her. We spoke about my marriage, and he was very respectful of it. He took me to the mall and shopped for my kids and gave me $400. When I got home my husband asked where I got the money to shop for the children and I lied to him. 

When Alex was going back to the States, I snuck away to see him off. We are still in touch. He calls me from time to time to check up on me, and occasionally sends me money for the kids. There’s nothing amorous happening between us, we are more like best friends now. So I want to appreciate him, Alex Holland, for taking care of me ever since he came into my life. I know that you are the best I never had or couldn’t keep. But it doesn’t matter anymore, I am just happy to have you in my life. I could think about going back in time to do things differently but all that won’t change anything. So I am just going to take this moment to appreciate you for your kindness, and your generosity. You are an amazing man, and I wish you all the happiness that life has to offer. 

—Peggy

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