I’ve known Efia since my first year at the university. We clicked the very first time we saw each other so we became good friends. At level two hundred, we both left the hall and rented a place together. There was no me without her and she didn’t go anywhere unless I was with her. Those who knew us called us twins because that’s just who we were on campus. 

After the university, we did our national service together at the same place. While doing our service, we started a business that didn’t work. We were selling clothes, shoes and other accessories to our colleagues. I’ll go to Kumasi and buy the things. Efia was the marketing type of person so she went around selling and giving the items on credit to those who desired. Many people bought and did not pay so the business collapsed. 

After national service, she didn’t go back home. We moved from our service place and came to Kumasi to begin our lives together. I met George and fell in love with him just around the time Efia was also coming out of a five-year relationship. It broke her into pieces. I tried all I could to help her but at some point, I had to leave her to break down so she could start building herself up again from the scratch. Because of her pain, I couldn’t tell her so much about George until one day she realized I was dating. 

This is what happened. I came home with George one day to meet Efia. When we got home, I said, “Efia, meet George, my boyfriend.” Because of what I’d told George, he expected so much from Efia but she didn’t say a lot. She only said, “Hi” and left the room.” George said, “It looks like she doesn’t like me.” I said, “She’s not well. When she’s ok, you’ll feel the vibe.”  

We left it there. In the house, the two of us can do a lot of crazier things together. One day, we made a TikTok video and shared on my status. When George saw the two of us goofing and laughing in the video, he commented, “Are you sure you two are friends?” I said, “Point of correction, we are not friends.  We are sisters. Twins with different parents.” He said, “You better be.” I didn’t think deeply about it. I thought it was one of those things. Another time he asked the same question after he had watched a video of us on my status. I asked, “Why are you surprised that we are just friends?” He said, the way you two behave, it doesn’t look like you’re just friends.” I asked, “How do we behave?” He said, “It’s ok. I’m only saying so don’t be offended.”

From there, I realized that anytime I mentioned Efia’s name, his posture changed. I thought it was because of the reception Efia gave him the very first day I introduced him to her. But it was deeper than that. One day he made it point-blank that he doesn’t like Efia. He said, “If our relationship would have problems it would be because of how you and that girl behave around each other. It’s suspecting and I now understand why she didn’t give me a good reception the day we met.” 

Our relationship was only three months old so I forgave him for his ignorance about me and my friend. I told him where we met, where we had been, the kind of things we’ve done together, the plans we’ve had, and how we had become each other’s support. He said, “Well, it’s a crazy world and anything at all can happen. I’m only being concerned.”

Honestly, George is a good guy. He’s very calm and would hardly hurt anyone. He’s one of those guys who cling to their girlfriends in a very good way. I realized he wanted more of me and I loved it. I loved his attention and I loved that little jealousy she showed whenever he thought he was competing with Efia for my attention. It made me feel like he was really into me. We’ve dated for over a year, and while we were busily dating, Efia was also going around making moves for herself. She found a job and left my place but the love between us never waned an inch. 

One evening, George called me on a video call and while we were talking, Efia walked behind me. He asked, “Who’s that?” I said, “Who else could it be?” He asked, “She came to spend the night?” I said, “No I’m at her place. I came to spend the weekend with her.” He said, “She left your place and you’re still chasing after her? Only God knows what you two do together.” He made a lot of insinuations but retrained himself from calling us names. I was waiting for it but he never said it.

One night I was sleeping at his place when I woke up and saw him going through my phone. I turned on my side and continued sleeping. A few minutes later, he tapped me, “Wake up. You see I’ve caught you? I knew it. I knew there was something going on?” I thought he had found a message a guy sent me and was reacting. He said, “Say the truth. You and Efia, what’s going on?” I asked, “What are you talking about?” He said, “I’m asking how long the two of you had been doing it. “Doing what?” I asked. He said, “Stop playing innocence, you know what I’m talking about. See what I’d found in your chats.” I asked, “What did you find?” He said, “Why was she telling you not to cheat on her. What’s going on?”

He kept asking a whole lot of questions; “Here you said you love her and she also responded with hearts.” Why do you call her bae sometimes? You two are lovers, right? You’re just toying with me. No wonder I don’t see excitement on your face when we are doing it.” He concluded that we were dating so nothing I said made sense to him. That night I couldn’t sleep. I was so embarrassed and pained at the same time. Early in the morning when he was still throwing accusations, Efia called. I didn’t want to pick but he said, “Pick the call and put on a loudspeaker.” Efia said, “Hey sweetheart, you slept well?” He screamed, “She slept well. Go and look for a boyfriend and stop chasing her around. She has a boyfriend now so you too find your own. It’s not woman to woman. It’s a man-to-woman. That’s how God created it.” 

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That day I knew I wouldn’t date him again. When I was leaving I said, “She was there before you so I won’t lose her because of you.” He said, “Take her to the altar. Marry her. It’s better that way than what you two are doing.” I said goodbye and left. He later sent a message; “If you want this relationship to work, cut all ties with her. If you can’t cut ties, then it means you’ve chosen her over me.” I responded, “Yes, I’ve chosen her over you. Deal with it.”

I didn’t hear from him again until a few days ago he came back apologizing. He said he wants me back. I said I don’t like him again. (Actually, I do) He promised he won’t come between us again if I give him another chance. Of course, I don’t believe that promise. My fear is giving him a chance again and later coming to accuse me of something I know nothing about. Efia knows what is going and she’s advising me to go back for him. Now I’m scared Efia wants me to go back to him so she could also leave the scene. 

Since we started dating, we’ve never had any issue apart from his complaints about the way I and Efiabehave together. He’s been supportive and caring. I want to have him back but….hmmm. 

–Amanda

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