The first time we were going to meet her father for our introduction, he fell sick, so we had to postpone. I told her we should still go so we could use the opportunity to check on his health. She said her father wouldn’t want to be seen when he was sick.

I agreed with her, but it didn’t stop me from giving her money to take care of his medical bills. Whatever they asked her to buy, she called me, and I would send her the money.

For close to a month, I spent money on this man’s health without complaint. She only had to ask me, and I would send the money. When the man got a little better, I asked to talk to him, or at least hear from his voice how he was doing. She asked me, “Talk to him as what? He’s yet to meet you. Let’s do that one first.”

READ ALSO: I’m Married But Was Dating A Married Man Until His Wife Taught Me A Lesson

It took us over six months before she agreed it was time for us to meet her dad. She had mad reverence for her dad. Her mom died when she was young. It was her father who took care of all four of them. He didn’t marry again. He worked only to take care of them and ensure they had a better life.

They were all able to attend university through their father’s hard work, so I can understand why she wouldn’t play when it came to issues concerning her dad.

Six months later, I filled the car boot with gifts, and we drove four hours to see this man. He shook hands with me. His hands were cold and feeble. His voice was very thin. He said he had heard of me and all the good things I’d been doing for his daughter.

We didn’t need to do another introduction because he already knew me. He said he was looking forward to our marriage, and he hoped it would happen before his death. I assured him we were ready and that we would do our best to marry in a way that honoured him. I presented the gifts to him, and he was so happy. He said, “It looks like you’re already paying the bride price. Thank you.”

I was elated to have gotten that hurdle out of the way. On our way home, we talked extensively about our future, the knocking rite, when we would do it, and also the date for our wedding. We talked about everything and agreed on the way forward.

Just when we were getting ready to go and perform the knocking rite, her father fell sick again. She said it was just a cold and he was going to get better soon. That took three months. I stopped talking about the marriage so it wouldn’t look like I was rushing it without considering her father’s health.

One day, she would say her dad had gotten better. We would put all the plans together and even inform him that we were coming. Sometimes, a night before the day we were supposed to go there, he would be sick again. Everyone got frustrated, so my family decided we should wait until he got better and he himself invited us.

I would call him and ask about his health, and he would say he was getting better. I was paying for every single drug they prescribed for him. I visited him once with her when I had the time.

One day, I met my girlfriend’s siblings. They also thanked me for everything I’d been doing for their dad. Her elder brother suggested that we could go ahead with the marriage even while their dad was sick. There were other family members who could stand in for their dad.

I thought it was a good idea. My girlfriend also didn’t object to it, and that made me feel like she was all for it. When we got home and I asked what she thought about it, she said, “My brother is not my father. He can’t tell me how I should organise my wedding. My dad will get better, and we will do it.”

The man was seventy-one and was always sick. Even he wanted our marriage to go on, but Matilda said no. Her father’s presence meant a lot to her.

One day, the sickness got very serious, and he spent weeks in the hospital. Eventually, they said he had prostate cancer, and it didn’t look like he was going to make it. The doctor said the longest he might have was two years.

We all cried about it. When I called the man and we talked, he sounded like he wanted to witness our marriage before his demise, but Tilly thought otherwise.

Not long ago, I asked her what she intended to do. She should give me concrete answers so I would know my next steps when it came to our wedding. She said, “My dad is already on his way. Let’s wait until he’s gone. Once we bury him, I can put my mind at rest and go on with the rest of my life.”

I was shocked. “Your father’s wish is to see us married. Why don’t we do it? Maybe that would even give him the strength to live a little longer.”

She said no.

I said, “Tilly, tell me the truth. Are you looking forward to marrying someone else and using me as a stopgap?”

What Caused The Breakup Between You And Your Ex?

She was furious for weeks and even suggested that if I didn’t trust her, then I should rather not think of marrying her than marry her with mistrust in my heart. I apologised and told her I didn’t say it well. I asked her to let it go, but she didn’t talk to me for a long time until she eventually came around.

We are here, ready for marriage. We started buying what we would need last year. They are all stuck in a bag, waiting for the day they’ll come out in celebration of our marriage. But we all have to wait until her dad dies and gets buried.

Please, does this make sense in any way?

—Kobby

This story you just read was sent to us by someone just like you. We know you have a story too. Email it to us at [email protected]. You can also drop your number and we will call you so you tell us your story.

******