At first, I thought she was out of my league but then I shoot my shot and she accepted. I thought to myself, “Is it that easy? And I was there playing small?” The happiest day of my life was the day she accepted my proposal and the second happiest day of my life was the day we had our first kiss—which happened just a couple of days after he had accepted my proposal. She’s someone who wants to always be in charge. When it comes to when to meet and where to meet, she decides it. I don’t have a problem. As far as she’s there in my life, I count it as all joy.

Why did I think she was out of my league? Well, it’s a combination of factors. I met her through a friend and when I told that friend that I wanted to date her, he told me, “Please stand aside. Don’t come and use your toothache to bite into meat reserved for the gods.” I asked, “You mean I can’t date her?” He said, “Look at her, does it look like she’ll date a guy like you?” A guy like me…

A guy like me who doesn’t have a great job. A guy like me who doesn’t have the money to spoil her. A guy like me who doesn’t own a car. A guy like me who lives in a corner room waiting for a better day to move out. A guy like me simply meant that I didn’t have the material things to use to impress the girl. I told him, “Haven’t you heard of, “Love don’t cost a thing?” He said, “Wait until you meet the floor girls, then you can tell them that.”

All because the girl had a car and dressed like she had everything going for her in her life. The first time I interacted with her, she didn’t look and sound like someone who’ll put a good guy down just because the guy wasn’t driving. So, I asked my friend, “Does she have a boyfriend? He said, “When it comes to you, yeah she has a boyfriend but I believe when the guy approaching her is properly placed in life, she might say she doesn’t have a boyfriend. It all depends on who is approaching her.”

I used the words of my friend as a springboard and jumped into the girl’s life. I loved her. I wanted to be with her but then again, I wanted to win her to prove to my friend that after all is said and done, a determined heart would always win. That’s why the day she said yes to me became one of the happiest days in my life. Apart from getting the girl, I also proved to my friend that nothing is impossible and I was worth it—I was worth everything I determined to have.

While I was dead in love with her and did everything to prove my love for her every day, she was relaxed about everything. If I don’t call, she doesn’t call too and she is alright by that. If I decide not to call the whole day and later call the next day, she won’t fight me. She won’t ask why I didn’t call. She will move on and talk to me as if my inability to call her didn’t mean a thing. I will send her a message and say, “I love you.” She will only send me a laughing emoji. I will tell her that I miss her and she will say “Awwwn.”

I was a little bit confused. So, I brought it to her attention. I asked, “Is it that you don’t love me too or you just don’t like to say it.” She said, “I’m not a wordy person. Those words actually don’t move me. Once in a while, it feels good to hear it but it doesn’t mean anything. If I don’t say it back to you, it doesn’t mean I don’t love you. It only means I’d rather show my love for you than to say it.”

And then one day we got intimate. She was crying throughout the action. I asked, “Are you ok?” She said, “Just keep going. I love you Ok? I love you with everything in me. I can’t imagine life without you. You make me feel like a complete woman and I’m happy to have you in my life.”

“Wow! So, she can say all that?” I thought to myself. Those words felt like grease in my waist so I kept going and going just to hear her say more of that.” In the end. She turned her back on me, pulled the cloth on her, and slept like a baby. The next morning when she woke up, I said, “I love you.” She simply smiled and went on with her life as if nothing matters.

What she told me the other time came to mind, “I’m not a wordy person…if I don’t say it back to you, it doesn’t mean I don’t love you.” That was my comfort. That was my consolation, knowing that it didn’t matter whether she said it or not. We’ve dated for about five months now. Her I-don’t-care attitude still continues. I’m the one always doing the calling. If I don’t call her, I will only get a “hi” from her on WhatsApp only when I’m lucky. If I don’t call. She’s fine. If I don’t bring up a plan to meet her, she’ll never arrange one. If I don’t knock on her door, she wouldn’t knock on mine. All this while that we’ve been dating, she had come to my place only once.

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She said it doesn’t matter because I’m always at her place. The love doesn’t feel balanced for me, I only feel appreciated and wanted when I’m on top of her. This girl will transform totally and say all the sweet things I’d been dying to hear her say. At one time she begged; “Please don’t leave me ok? No matter what, please stay. I can be stubborn but I still love you.” After saying all that, she will then start to direct the affairs; “Faster, please continue hitting there…Yeah, don’t stop. Faster! Faster!

She’s never satisfied. No matter how many times you do it with her, she’ll wake up and ask for one more. At that moment, she’ll speak all the words; Those sweet words, just to get me aroused and scratch her itch.

As I’m writing this, it’s been two solid days since we talked. I said I wasn’t going to call her until she calls. Not that I haven’t tried that before, I stopped calling and waited to see if she was going to call me. I waited and waited until I could no longer wait so I picked the phone and called her myself. This is what I want to know. Is it normal for a woman who’s in love with you to treat you this way? Act like she doesn’t care? Say nothing when you tell her that you love her? Is it normal for a lady to be this detached and still love you?”

She’s not cheating or dating anyone else, this I know for sure. I’ve been in her place unannounced several times. She’s the only lady I’ve dated that does not keep a password on her phone. I don’t for once feel that I’m in competition with anyone. She just doesn’t care and this is my concern. Is it normal?

–Justice

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