Two weeks before our wedding, our test results from the hospital came out, and we were called to go for them. We were sitting in the consulting room, holding hands, our hearts in the pit of our stomachs, beating hard.

When I learnt that I was a sickle cell carrier, it put me on guard when it came to my love life and my health. I would start liking a man, and if he didn’t know his genotype, it immediately put me on edge. I would become shaky and afraid of what the possibility could be.

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What if I was already head over heels in love with him and then found out he was also a carrier?

Because of that fear, I usually insisted that the men I dated got their genotype tested. Some did, but with those people, we eventually ended things because the feelings were no longer there. Some didn’t. They got tired of me nagging and left.

One thing I knew for sure was that I could not overlook it. I was very picky when it came to dating because I wanted to be sure I was making the right decision for my future children. I wanted to date an AA man.

So, when I got into a relationship with my husband and we decided to get married, I thought I had already dealt with my biggest fear. If my husband was AA, then what could possibly be the problem?

But as much as the doctor tried to keep a neutral face, I knew there was something wrong.

He told us that my husband was a carrier of the Hepatitis B virus.

For a moment, I didn’t even know what to say.

I knew very little about Hepatitis B because, throughout my dating life, my focus had always been on genotype compatibility. That was what scared me. That was what I always wanted to be sure about. I had never imagined that another health condition could suddenly come between us, especially just two weeks before our wedding.

What were we going to do?

My husband was prescribed medicines and sought medical advice. We also explored other forms of treatment. Thankfully, we were not intimate at the time, so we didn’t have to worry about me contracting the virus and passing it on.

It was a lot to process, especially with our wedding so close. We had already made plans. Our families knew. Everything was in motion. Yet, suddenly, we were faced with a health issue neither of us had expected.

But we got married regardless.

After the wedding, we repeated the test. This time, there was some relief. We were told there was no need to panic because the virus was dormant. We breathed a sigh of relief, but we did not become careless. We were advised that he needed to watch his health, take care of himself and continue following medical advice.

Almost ten years later, I can look back at that period differently.

Today, by the grace of God, we have been happily married for almost ten years and are blessed with two wonderful children. Both my children and I have tested negative for Hepatitis B.

Sometimes, life has a way of frightening you just when you think everything is finally falling into place. What initially felt like the end of our dreams became a testimony of faith, knowledge and responsible health decisions.

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To my sister facing a similar situation, I want to say this: don’t lose hope. Take time to understand the condition. Seek proper medical care, follow professional advice and make informed decisions.

Sometimes, what seems like the end of the road is only the beginning of a different journey.

–Esinam

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