When Our second child, a girl, was born, my husband made it clear he didn’t want another child. We had two girls. I wanted more. Three or four kids, hoping a boy will pop out of the next. He didn’t agree. Two was enough for him.
He said it with his lips but didn’t do anything to prevent another pregnancy so I got pregnant again when the second one was only two years old. I was elated. I prayed for a boy and hoped it was going to be a boy. I told my husband, “The boy is coming.” He asked indifferently, “What do you mean a boy is coming?”
I winked at him and pointed at my tummy. He didn’t say another word. I went around teasing him; “Third and then fourth then we are done.” I ran my fingers through his hair as I walked back into the living room. He didn’t move or say a word.
The incessant spitting started quickly. Mostly, there was a bitter taste in my mouth. I complained to him. The next day when he returned from work, he gave me a gum or something that looked like a gummy. He said, “Chew it. It helps to brighten up your day and takes the bitter tastes off your mouth.”
It tasted bland but I liked the scent. I asked what it was and he didn’t give me a name. He gave me another one the following day and then the next day. I remember asking for more and he told me it was finished. A few days later, I got a miscarriage.
It happened at dawn. I woke up in the morning to see stained sheets. Nothing could help. I lost the pregnancy.
My husband acted shocked and pained and restless. I was the one calming him down but looking back, I’m suspecting him of foul play. Those gummies he gave me. Three times in three days. He never gave me another one. He didn’t let me see the box they came in or the inscriptions on the box. To date, he pretends he has forgotten the name and that he picked it randomly in traffic.
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I want to know. Is there a drug of such nature that causes miscarriage? Gummy in nature, sweet-scented but bland in taste? I will never forgive him if that was his plan. What if it got complicated? Could there be any side effects that I don’t know? I pray it’s all coincidence because if that was his plan, I swear something will have to give.
— Efua
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My sister sorry for your loss. As you said your husband wanted two kids so please settle for that or if possible meet and have a discussion to know the way forward. If he decides not to listen to you then please be content with the two blessings and also do some family planning.
I thought child bearing and the number of kids is not down and up to one partner? It’s something you both need to tlk about and agree with a particular number of kids to have. Something is telling me the gummies were the cause of your miscarriage. I don’t think there’s anything you can do at this point, your either accept the fact that you already lost the baby, he doesn’t want another addition to the family or you fight him with all you want. If he doesn’t want more kids, why not go to the hospital and seek medical help rather than go through that route. What if you have complication through the gummies? I believe married women don’t usually run out of ideas when it comes to having dealings with their husband? You can use women trick to get ur answers.
Efua, I think you are stretching it too far and getting paranoid after the miscarriage. Let it go, sit with your husband and have candid discussion on the number of children you really want. Get him to agree and see why another child or two will not be a challenge for your family. He will agree and come along. Be patient on yourself and your husband for any perceived role any one of you might have played in the miscarriage. Peace and cheers from here.