I am a beautiful and calm young lady. I am not the outing type. That’s why I don’t easily get involved in relationships. My last relationship started nicely. I made sure the guy knew and understood my personality. Communication flowed easily between us as well. I was happy until my man started asking for intimacy. This was something we agreed wouldn’t happen until marriage. So why the sudden change?
I tried not to compromise my values for his pleasure but it wasn’t easy. Every day came with a different intensity of pressure. At some point, he suggested that I at least let him touch certain parts of me so he could compensate himself for not getting the real thing. It took much persuasion to allow him to go a little beyond kissing. Two years into the relationship I saw no sign of seriousness on his part when it came to settling down.
One day I read a message between him and a lady he had just met. He was telling her he was single. They talked a lot. The lady even invited him to her place for a sleepover. I was so heartbroken. As much as it hurt me more than I expected, I broke up with him. I asked him to go ahead and be with whoever he wants considering he is single. As I tried to move on, I made a promise to myself not to do another relationship.
Months later, I was on a page on Valentine’s Day. One popular woman on the page made a post about her relationship with her husband. They met in the most unforeseen circumstance and their marriage was eleven years old and going strong. I commented, “I pray I can find such a man. I want someone who is determined to love me and put in the work because am willing to build with him.”
A few minutes later, I got a message in my inbox. The person said, “God has answered your prayer. I am back here again.” His name is Frank. We spoke in the past but things didn’t progress beyond a few pleasantries. That day too, we chatted briefly for five minutes and ended it there. I was not interested in any man at the time so I paid little attention to him. Weeks passed and he said hi again. This time around he gave me his number but I did not call him. Later, he came to request mine. I gave it to him but the communication was on and off.
He told me he wanted to come and know my place. I was not very busy but I kept telling him that I was busy so we wouldn’t meet. Out of nowhere, this guy started referring to me as bae. I found it weird considering that he had proposed love to me for me to accept. The more we talked, the more he talked about how much he wanted to see me.
By and by, we planned to meet last Saturday. He said he wanted to meet my parents to discuss marriage. I didn’t want that so fast so I didn’t allow it. I suggested we go out instead and just talk. He talked about a very nice place he knows that I would like. It was closer to his place than mine. So I decided to set off early so I wouldn’t stay out too long.
At the time I decided to leave home, I couldn’t reach him. So I slept. When I woke up, he had called several times. I cancelled the meeting but he was apologetic. “Please, I was really looking forward to seeing you. Try and come. If it gets late and you are not able to return, you can sleep at my place. You have nothing to worry about when it comes to me.” He seemed genuine so I agreed to go ahead and meet him.
Because I don’t go out, I didn’t know that the place was far. I was in a car for three hours amidst traffic before I finally got to my destination. When I finally met him, my struggles to get to him were forgotten. It was nice to be in his company. We spoke extensively about what we each liked and disliked. We also agreed to try a relationship that day. We laid some ground rules, and “no sex before marriage” was number one on the list for me.
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He agreed to everything I said that night and pretended to share my values. I say pretended because I found out when we got to his place that this guy is a monster. He doesn’t hear the word, stop. When he started making advances at me, I told him I hadn’t done it before and that I was not ready. “Liar,” that’s what he called me. He couldn’t accept the fact that I was still a virgin at 30.
I fought him with all my strength but I grew weary. I even broke my nose while I was struggling with him. I still lost in the end. By the time he was done with me, I was in pain and bleeding. He even came inside me. Yet he didn’t even attempt to get me a postpill. His house was at a very isolated place but he did not attempt to get me a car so I would go home safely. He just left me in the middle of the road.
A Guy Caught Us Doing It And Started Raising An Alarm
I want to put him behind bars, but now that a little time has passed, I don’t know how to go about it. Please, I need some guidance. If I could get a Gynae to help with some treatment too, I would be grateful.
At this point in my life, I have completely lost faith in men. I was already afraid of men from childhood. That’s why I never went to a man’s room. The one time I decided to take a leap of faith and open up myself to someone, look at what happened to me.
—Moira
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Sorry for the pain you are going through. I don’t know where you are but there is a hospital called St.john fertility Centre at tantra hills . Their services is very good. Seek therapy too . Not all men are the same. After seeking the help that you need please report him to the police. We don’t need men like him walking about freely causing havoc. Engage in church activities to take your mind off the incidence. I wish you a speedy recovery.
You played too cheap into his hands. The one who stayed with you for two years couldn’t take you as such, it was the one that is on and off that succeeded in the most cruel way. Sorry for your predicament. Weigh your chances before you take a step towards h8m sha…..
Do report him to the police but just as you said it has been some time in between therefore the police may not have the physical evidence to prove that he did what you were saying. It’s going to be your word against his word but don’t sit without doing anything.
Seek counseling and medical help as you have found the need.
Sorry you had to go through this. Please, for your sake and the sake of other ladies out there, please arrest him and ensure he’s jailed.
Report him to the police
It doesn’t matter what time has passed. Report him and and let him deny when the police visits him. People in his house will know of this. His reputation is at stake.