I live with my sister and her husband. For three years I’ve been nothing but amazing to them. I cook their food, clean, run errands and help take care of their kids. Their kids call me mom, that should tell you how deep the relationship goes.

My sister’s husband isn’t the talking type. When we talk, it’s about the little things. We could be in the house and say nothing to each other. He doesn’t hate me. It’s his character to be quiet.

Not long ago, his friend came to visit. Through my sister, I got to know his friend was from abroad. I cooked the meals. I served them. I cleaned the place when they were done. His friend said hello to me and I responded. He smiled and asked my name and I told him. The next time when he came around, he called me by name. He asked how I was doing and I told him I was fine.

He didn’t come around again until I heard he had gone back abroad. Days ago, my sister and her husband had an argument. I was in my room so I overheard what they were saying. My sister was like, “Why did you have to tell him all that? You went too far.”

They were talking about the friend who visited. According to what I learned, the man was interested in me and asked about me from my sister’s husband, only for my sister’s husband to give him a bad review about me. That I’m not smart. That I don’t know how to keep my room clean and that, my sister have to push me around before I do anything so he wouldn’t recommend me to his friend.

I broke down and cried. I’m twenty-eight. I live with them because of certain issues beyond my control. What he said were all lies. I don’t know what I did for him to say all that about me. This would have been a great opportunity for me to know a man and study him to know what the future holds for us but my sister’s husband decided to swat the opportunity off my table.

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I don’t want it to end there. I know the man’s name. I’ve checked him out on Facebook. He’s very active here. I want to throw him a message and give him the opportunity to know me for who I truly am. I want to ask, is that a bad idea? I’m not going to badmouth my sister’s husband. I just want another opportunity to prove myself to a man who was genuinely interested in me. What do you think?

—Agatha

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