Two people said the same thing to me about my girlfriend. The first was her own friend. I thought it was out of sheer jealousy or she was out to destroy our relationship. Out of love, I told my girlfriend what her friend has told me. “Are you fighting with Agatha,” I asked her. “She shook her head and asked me, “Why do you ask? We are not fighting.”
“Oh really? She sent me a message. Let me show it to you.”
After reading the message she asked me, “Are you sure it’s Agatha who sent you this message? I answered, “You can check her number. Why would I lie?”
She went quiet for a very long period. She was thinking about something. I asked what the problem was and she shook her head. All she said was, “Friends? I will never trust any friend again.”
I didn’t ask if what her friend said was true. I didn’t for the life of me believe my girlfriend could be the one she was talking about in the message. I met her in church. She was not just an ordinary church member. She was very active in church activities and played key roles in many church societies. No, she couldn’t have been the one.
The next person who said the same thing about my girlfriend was a guy who once dated a friend of my girlfriend. He was like, “Are you her customer or you’re seriously dating her? I know she stopped but who will ever date a retired prostitute or you didn’t know?”
I was like, “Wait. What are you talking about? You’ve mistaken her for someone else. She’s not the one. This is my girlfriend. We’ve been dating for quite a while now. She is not a prostitute.” He answered, “Ah, guy man paaa. You mean I don’t know Doris. I don’t talk to my ex again, I would have called her for you so she tells you the whole story. This girl was standing on the street, hopping from car to car making money out of prostitution. I stopped my girlfriend from being friends with her because of this.”
I defended her. I gave evidence to the contrary. The guy laughed at me. He said, “It’s Ok. You’re in love. When the love tear from your eye top, you’ll know the truth.”
In my heart and mind, everything the guy said was true. He knew a lot. He called my girlfriend by name and narrated a lot of stories my girlfriend had already told me but I protested. I was loud enough to drawn his voice but my conscience kept telling me, “He’s right. He’s not the first person to tell you this. Believe him.”
When I met Doris, I told her, “Tell me the truth. What Agatha told me some weeks ago, is it true? Were you once in the street? Just be honest with me and I promise you it won’t change a thing.” She retorted, “Oh so you’re still thinking about what that mad girl told you? It’s jealousy. She doesn’t like that I’m happy. Don’t mind her. It’s never true.”
I told her everything the other guy told me. The names he mentioned. The stories he told me corroborated the stories she herself had told me. “He knows you and knows the people you know. Is he also lying?”
She was quiet. The next time she spoke she said, “Why are you going around asking people about me? Why don’t you ask me about me but rather talk to people about me? You don’t trust the answers I will give you? It’s ok. Go ahead and trust them. You can believe what they say since you don’t believe me.”
She wasn’t ready to talk about it so she walked away. I tried to stop her. I was ready to talk and see the way forward for us but she was broken by the fact that I was talking to people. Even when I explained to her; “I didn’t go around looking for people. They came looking for me.”
She believed in her own theory and walked away.
I called Agatha. I was ready to know the truth. She was angry with me because the first time she told me about it, I told my girlfriend and mentioned her name. She cut the call on me and even blocked my line. The next person I went to look for was the ex-girlfriend of the guy who called my girlfriend by name.
When I met her and started asking the questions she asked who sent me. “Are you a journalist? Are you from her church? I know she’s a good Christian now. Why are you asking all these questions?”
When I told her I was Doris’ boyfriend she said, “Oh, then why don’t you ask her but you’re here asking me? Please, I don’t know anything. Other people were talking about it but I didn’t see her with my own eyes so I can’t say anything.”
That girl didn’t tell me anything no matter how hard I tried so I concluded that what those two people told me was the truth.
Our relationship wasn’t the same again. She didn’t want to talk to me again and I was also disappointed that she didn’t tell me the truth. Days rolled into weeks and we were still not talking to each other. One day, I tried to Whatsapp her and I realized I’d been blocked. I called and I had been blocked there too. I called with a different line and she picked. When she heard it was my voice, she cut the call.
All that while we were not talking, I didn’t see her so I decided to go and look for her. I was told she had travelled a week ago. I asked when she was coming and the person said, “I don’t know. She packed a lot of things. I don’t think she’s coming any time soon.”
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Two years later, I had a new job and the job brought me to this new place where Doris travelled to. I felt the universe was saying something to me. I used a new number to track her down. She didn’t know it was me until we met face-to-face a week later. She was looking beautiful. It looked like she was living a new life. A comfortable life I must say.
I apologized to her and told her I was ready to make things happen regardless of our past. She told me it was too late. According to her, she was seeing another guy who knew her past and was still comfortable with it. She travelled to this new place because she wanted to have a new beginning in a new place where nobody knew about her past.
It is true she was once on the street but according to her, she did it for only four months because she needed the money. She wanted to do it for one month but she got sucked into the business and she overstayed. That was why some of her friends got to know about it and advised her to stop and she did. She told me, “I was going to tell you but you got ahead of me so I didn’t know how to defend myself.”
We are good friends now but she won’t give me another chance because I remind her of her past. Sometimes she tells me she regrets the fact that I got to know her place. She didn’t want to have anything to do with her past.
She lied about having a boyfriend. She’s single but she won’t give me any chance. I still want her. For some strange reason, I’ve been empty since she left my life. The old me would have looked for another girl and fallen in love with her but no. I’m still hanging on to hope that someday she will say yes to me. I want to know what I can do to speed up the process.
Call Your Husband And Tell Him You Love Him | Silent Beads
Everyone tells me I should take my time but time is not on our side. She’s so beautiful she might meet someone very soon. I want to be the one she will say yes to but currently, she thinks I know too much to love her for who she was and is. In my heart, I can do that. How do I prove to her that regardless of her past and what I know, I would love her the way she deserves to be loved? I need to know.
—Logan
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Anyone she meets is going to go through the same stages that you have gone through, so you are way ahead. Just stick with it. Just continue with friendship. Don’t mention anything else. Remember, she is also scared. Take it slowly and lightly.